Reactive children: what to do with hyperactivity? Hyperactive child at school Hyperactive child at school what to do.

Many parents and teachers ask this question. We tell you how to interact with students who have Attention Deficit Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

You may be mildly or severely confused if you encounter such children for the first time. They rush around the classroom, answer without raising their hands, cannot sit in one place and interfere with others and themselves. So? Partly. But, if you are reading this article, it means that you are a real professional and are worried about your students. Our job is to try to help you.

To begin with, let's try to figure out whether we understand the phenomena of ADD (attention deficit disorder) and ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) correctly.

Olya Kashirina. He constantly speaks, and speaks incessantly, in the classroom and at recess, on the topic and off topic. She can’t sit still, she constantly fidgets, bites her nails or a pen.
Vasya Zagoretsky. Quiet from the middle row. Soars in the clouds, completely detached from what is happening, answers the teacher's questions inappropriately, and sometimes spontaneously gives out something far from the topic of discussion.

Which of them suffers from these syndromes? Of course, it seems that Olya. But in fact, Vasya too.

Main characteristics

Impulsiveness. Sudden answers, sudden movements, such children are even called "on their minds."
inattention. Absent-mindedness, wandering in the clouds, constant distraction from the topic of the lesson and big problems with concentration.
Hyperactivityb. The topic of our discussion. An awl instead of an inner core, forgive us this joke.

These three indicators can be combined, and as a result we get children not only "reactive", but simply inattentive, sometimes even a little slow, who nevertheless still fall into the category of ADHD.
Perhaps a child with hyperactivity may seem like a real problem for a teacher. Twitchy, preventing others from responding, and sometimes, on the contrary, depressed. But such a child is always "in the know", isn't it? He is easily involved in the discussion, raises his hand and shows interest in non-standard formats.
But the most common combination, which at the same time brings the most diverse set of impressions to both parents and teachers, are children who are impulsive, and inattentive, and hyperactive. “Oh, I know such a child!” - now exclaimed those reading our article. We all know these kids. It is these students who have "periods" of behavior, ebb and flow.

And although in this article we were going to talk only about hyperactive children, we cannot do without comments about the "dreamers" with ADD/ADHD.

Invisible Apprentice

You know those too. Each class has its quiet, quiet dreamer at the window or a girl drawing something in the margins of a notebook. Alas, those children whose ADHD is more “inattentive” (the second indicator on our list) become invisible. As if Harry Potter had given them his mantle for a while. They do not show signs of violent behavior, so teachers treat them calmly or even in no way. What is the result? And as a result, the child becomes isolated and “absent”.
Parents scold him for bad grades, teachers for inattention, peers tease him by sticking the label “out of this world”. But what if it's not the child's fault?

It should be noted that boring or the same type of tasks lead to the transition of such children from the “on” state. to the "off" state. And it's not about "absence", absent-mindedness or inattention, because you yourself know: these guys turn on when they have a favorite activity. They are able to focus on what interests them. That is, the teacher will have to experiment with methods of presenting information and work on the inclusion of a larger percentage of the class (we often write about these methods in our group in in social networks).

For successful adaptation, such children may need the help of a psychologist or mentor who will “talk” the child and help them find themselves. More on this at the Fall Mentoring Conference GlobalMentori 2017.

Let's talk about the positives

Your hyperactive fidgets have some unique features, try using them in class.

1. Flexible thinking
Yes, these dreamers and visionaries can simultaneously consider 3-4 options for answering or solving a certain problem. In the natural sciences, offer them more "qualitative tasks" aimed at finding the causes of phenomena. In Russian or literature, allow the use of non-typical response forms. Let the essay be in verse, we are not on the exam. Get them interested.
2. Personal opinion
Yes, when we ask in a history lesson about the date of the baptism of Russia, we want to hear a clear year in response. But, if the question suggests multiple options, ask a hyperactive child. There were definitely more than 5 reasons for the 1917 revolution. As a historian, I can name 15. What if your student finds even more?
3. Comments
Yes, with their comments, inappropriate jokes or gestures, such children can bring down the general serious mood. But this is your way to get the engagement you want. Is the class silent? Ask your hyperactive dreamer. The fiery child's eloquence will surely awaken the sleeping class.

And yes, dear colleagues, such children keep us, teachers, in good shape. Such children will never do the same task twice.

Tips for working with children with hyperactivity, ADD and ADHD

When it comes to a medical diagnosis, please do not rely on this article alone, you will need a curriculum and a school psychologist.

Stay in dialogue with your parents or start one. Necessarily! They will only be grateful to you for a simple human attitude. Sometimes parents can suggest techniques that you can safely take to work.

Do not try to change the child, yes, you can educate him, but you do not need to correct his personality.

Ask the children themselves what they like. Take information from the source, he knows exactly HOW he likes to learn.

Talk to the class. It can be difficult for both the quiet and the forced upstart to adapt to the environment of "normal" children, and it is better for you to subtly control the situation in order to avoid bullying in the future.

To bring a child with hyperactivity back to work, use not a raised tone, but a personal appeal and eye contact.

Students with ADHD may find it difficult to organize information and concentrate on something. They need a system. Use infographics (find it in ours), step-by-step instructions, tips - both educational and life.

Present any requirements to the child in different ways. Write on the board, speak, put the printed task on the table. For elementary grades, task cards and reference pictures are very good.

Try not to let your child with ADHD out of your sight. Quiet people often sit on the back desks, as well as overly active guys. Better put them closer to your table. If we are talking about younger students - give the child a sheet or notebook, ordinary scribbles will help him concentrate. And get toys to relieve stress. An ordinary cube or a soft ball with semolina that you can fiddle with will help to calm your “restless hands”.

Your main task as a teacher is to ensure that the child comprehends the material received. And you can always comprehend in different ways, so use different methods of fixing information. Stickers, boards with cards, colored pencils, markers, pen and paper, filling out tables - everything can be used, try it.

Break any task into parts. Better less and gradually. And do not forget to repeat the task, again and again.

Don't forget about the game format. Yes, “we are at school, not at the circus”, but healthy humor and high-quality involvement in the educational process has not bothered anyone yet.

Attention Deficit Children, as the name suggests, need your feedback. Comment on their work and praise, only then they will try harder. It is important for them not only to understand the requirements, but also to get an assessment of their result. With the right praise in the child himself, you can form a motivation that will help him control himself.

Different children come to school: prepared and not very prepared, slow, nimble and too nimble. The last category is the most troublesome for parents and teachers. These are called hyperactive.

In fairness, it should be noted that ordinary children are often brought under this label, because normally a child should jump, run, make noise, scream, indulge, “poke your nose” into other people's affairs, demand something, disobey, obey and go compromise with adults. However, most adults want their children to be serious and focused, not to be naughty, to do their homework on their own and obey unquestioningly. Any deviation from the ideas of adults is perceived as a deviation from the norm.

What is child hyperactivity?

Hyperactivity is characterized by the prefix "over". These children have an increased need for movement, they are very active, speak loudly, and react to the slightest stimuli.

Hyperactivity - the predominance of the process of excitation over inhibition. Normally, these opposite processes take approximately the same time (with slight deviations in one direction or another). Excitation in hyperactive children occurs very quickly, almost instantly, but the process of inhibition takes a long time.

Let's take a situation as an example. There is a test in the regular class. Children are fascinated by solving tasks, when suddenly a large red balloon flies past the window. How will the children behave?

The vast majority of children (2/3) will react to a non-standard situation by turning their heads, interjections, comments. When the ball disappears, they will continue their activities.

There are children who will not even pay attention to the incident, or will, but reluctantly and far from immediately. At the same time, they will quickly return to the activity from which they were distracted.

But there will also be someone who, at the first appearance, “breaks loose” from his place, runs up to the window and watches the object until it disappears from view. It will be difficult for such a child to return to completing tasks.

In the first case, the processes of excitation are approximately equal to the processes of inhibition. In the second case, the predominance of the inhibition process is observed, when the children are very enthusiastic and focused on the activity. The third case is a classic example of a hyperactive child.

Manifestations of childhood hyperactivity

It is not difficult to identify a hyperactive child among peers. However, adults often justify the usual childish bad manners with a label. It is necessary to clearly define hyperactivity by some typical indicators:

1. Easy distractibility from any kind of activity, even the most interesting. Children switch from class to class.
2. Rapid excitability, instant involvement in any active activities.
3. Loud speech, usually fast.
4. When writing, children make typical mistakes:
   • do not put punctuation marks;
   • do not add words;
   • liken syllables: “momotok” instead of “hammer”, etc.
   • often correct the text without improving the quality.
5. They make a lot of unnecessary movements.
6. Something is constantly being dropped or lost.
7. Speech is fuzzy and confused, coherent monologue speech causes difficulties.
8. The child has an untidy appearance and is not able to control it during the day.
9. The child is often surrounded by disorder: on the table, in the room, closet, briefcase.

These are side characteristics of a hyperactive child. The main feature of hyperactivity is a high need for movement, which is physiologically determined. The child simply cannot do without movement. The control of one's motor reactions simultaneously with the suppression of the need for movement causes a very strong nervous tension in the child.

Hyperactivity can be diagnosed by neuropathologists using special test methods. However, few people turn to a specialist for help. Most often, a hyperactive child is forced to adapt to environmental conditions on their own, which does not always happen safely.

Adult mistakes in dealing with hyperactive children

Mistake 1. Punishing a child for being too active.

This is the most common occurrence. Often you can hear the remark of adults: “do not fidget”, “do not fidget”, “do not scratch”, etc. Most often, these remarks do not lead to results, but simply transfer the child from one action to another. Can a thirsty person be punished for wanting to drink? The answer to this question corresponds to the attitude towards a hyperactive child.

Mistake 2. Depriving the child of physical activity.

There is a misconception that a hyperactive child should not be overexcited. For this reason, parents bring the child to school by car, and teachers try to deprive him of activity during breaks. This is fundamentally wrong. A hyperactive child must realize his own.

Mistake 3. Giving children the opportunity to constantly move.

This is a backlash when adults give a hyperactive child complete freedom of movement. The child needs to be taught to live with his hyperactivity, controlling it. To do this, you need to gradually increase the length of time during which the child must independently control his behavior.

How to help a hyperactive child

A hyperactive child causes a lot of trouble to others. But it's not easy for him. He is well aware that he does not live up to expectations, understands what causes anxiety, makes ridiculous mistakes and receives low marks. A hyperactive child needs help.

Firstly, provide the child with an outlet for motor energy. Greater mobility can provide children with classes in sports clubs and sections, dance studios.

Secondly, create daily conditions for children to release energy: exercises, walking to school, games of medium mobility during breaks, movement during the lesson: assistance in distributing equipment in the lesson, etc.

Thirdly, plan a motor break in the daily routine between school lessons and homework.

Fourth, pay attention to the child's nutrition. Include in the diet foods that require energy for digestion (nuts, meat, etc.).

Fifth, conduct classes on the development of concentration. Make it harder every time.

At sixth, teach children to bring their activities to the end (solve a problem, finish drawing).

Seventh, teach children to control their appearance and order around them.

Hyperactivity of a child is not a sentence, but a children's problem that needs to be addressed. The child must learn to control his behavior, and this requires the help of adults. A properly organized life of a student and support from adults will gradually lead to positive results: an active energetic personality will grow out of a hyperactive student.

Svetlana Sadova

“The child is constantly distracted in the classroom, indulges, interferes with the others ... I am constantly called to school. What to do?" “The son is excessively disinhibited, runs away from the classroom, does not listen to the teacher. How to make him study? ADHD for someone is a set of letters, and for someone it is a diagnosis that makes parents go to certain specialists. Many mistakenly think that attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is about the fact that the child lacks parental attention. No, this is a specific diagnosis. In this article, psychologist Victoria Musatova will tell you how to get a child with ADHD interested in learning.

ADHD: how to get a hyperactive child interested in learning?

What is ADHD?

In order to do homework, it is important to choose a period of time during which the child optimally maintains concentration. For example, it's ten minutes. But keep in mind that any task must be completed, i.e. It is important to praise the child. Next - we switch attention, we need a change of activity. Combine with physical activity is not worth it, because. overexcitation will begin and it will be simply impossible to focus on “quiet” activities again.

When doing lessons, the table should be clear of unnecessary items. Only a pen, a book and a notebook. The room should also be cleared of toys, distracting objects such as: phone, computer, TV. The task of the parent is not to do homework for the child, but to teach them to correctly understand the task, write it down, add, subtract, collect things in a briefcase, and be organized.

For more successful learning, a system of tokens can help parents. For example, a child receives a token for each correctly completed task. He saves them and then exchanges them for a prize or a gift, best of all, if these are emotions. For example, going to the water park with the whole family. Spending quality time together helps a lot to correct this disorder.

It is advisable to arrange an individual day for the child at least twice a month. Only mother and child, then only father and child. At such moments, you do not need to discuss his grades at school or learn lessons, it is better to listen to the child, to his desires and thoughts. Based on the fact that children with ADHD are often reprimanded due to the fact that they differ in behavior from other children, they have low self-esteem and increased anxiety. There is a feeling that he is worthless, and it can become stronger and haunt him throughout his life. Therefore, individual days will help restore balance.

With ADHD, it is necessary to organize proper nutrition for the child

You also need to normalize proper nutrition. For example, citrus fruits, rye, barley, wheat are not the best foods for children with ADHD. im more dairy products, meat, fish are needed, - those that do not have extractive properties.

It is important to remember that a strict daily routine is important for children with this disorder. For example, you need to get ready for bed in advance, perhaps you should start at 19.00 to go to bed at 21.00. We need consistency in the actions of both the child and the parents. Spontaneity and chaos can only hurt. Overexcitation should be kept to a minimum. Cartoons, blockbusters are best replaced with tennis, football and fresh air.

Generally, sports are very important for a child with ADHD, because if he does not “splash out” his energy, then energy toxicosis will occur, which leads to overexcitation. It is best to choose a sport that requires maximum concentration e.g. hockey, ping pong. It is important to find an activity that will please the child.

It is recommended to include yoga for children in the schedule. It will help to relax, establish proper breathing and relax. This is important to teach the child.

Classes with a neuropsychologist are also indicated, as a rule, they include: stretching, breathing exercises, oculomotor exercises, functional exercises, communication exercises, visualization, relaxation, massage. Functional exercises consist of the development of attention, arbitrariness and
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At home, you can do neuroexercises on your own, otherwise they are called asymmetric exercises for brain development. They are useful for adults too. For example, the exercise "fist-rib-palm". First show the child, then he repeats. Put your fist on the table, then from the fist put your hand in the position of the edge, and then into the palm. It is necessary to ensure that the fingers are tightly pressed against each other. Do it in forward and reverse order. To learn, do it slowly at first, and then, when it starts to work out, speed up the pace.

The next exercise: raise your left arm and right leg up, parallel to your right arm and lower your left leg down. It's important not to get confused.

Alternatively, for stretching at home, you can offer to imagine the child that he is a jellyfish and, sitting on the floor, make smooth movements with his hands, imitating a jellyfish.

For relaxation, you can turn off the lights, turn on the night light and classical music, and just lie silently for three or four minutes, provided that no one gets up and does not move. At first it will be difficult, the child needs to be controlled and returned to its original state, but over time, he will learn to control himself and get relaxation. Such an exercise can be done before going to bed, when all the work has already been completed and there is no need to be distracted by anything.

Breathing exercises at home can be performed using candles. The parent lights, the child blows. You can also blow up balloons with your mouth.

I recommend buying home the neuropsychological game "Try it, repeat it" and a quick reading of "Read it, grab it." In support of parents, I also encourage them to sign up for ADHD forums and connect with families who are already struggling with ADHD learning.

And in order not to "drown" in this diagnosis, read Irina Lukyanova's book "Extreme Motherhood". This is a clear, practical guide on how to behave in different situations, how to help your child in school, etc.

In conclusion, I would like to quote W. Shakespeare: "Our medicines often lie in ourselves ...". Be patient, the path of teaching a child with ADHD will not be easy. But with the common sense of parents and the understanding of teachers, you will lead your child to success! Health to you and your children!

Thank you for your time. We welcome your questions and comments.

She graduated from the Tver State Technical University with a degree in Organizational Psychology, as well as a master's degree in Psychology. Currently studying in the direction of "Clinical Psychology". Practicing psychologist. Since 2015, she has been practicing with children with disabilities (HIA). She worked in a neuropsychiatric sanatorium, has experience working with children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, mental retardation, speech development delay, general speech underdevelopment, cerebral palsy, minimal brain dysfunction, acoustic spectrum disorders. Regularly improves his professional experience at refresher courses.

School classes for children begin with a period of addiction. It goes differently for everyone, but children with hyperactivity and attention deficit adapt worse - 10% of the total. ADHD is diagnosed more often in children from the age of six or seven, sometimes earlier: if problems with behavior, learning and communication have already appeared in kindergarten. Significant adults - parents and educators - should help a child with ADHD on a daily basis. The Village spoke with neuropsychologist Natalya Andreeva about how to help a first grader with ADHD cope with difficulties at school and become successful in learning and communication.

What gets in the way of children with ADHD in school?

All the major problems in children with ADHD are caused by the immaturity of the frontal structures, which are responsible for self-control and planning. It is difficult for such children to concentrate on tasks, they are often distracted, forget notebooks or lose things. They cannot do their homework on their own, do not know how to stick to a schedule, and very rarely write down their homework.

Teachers often complain about such students: they interfere with teachers, classmates, chat in class. A child with ADHD learns much less information in the classroom due to the fact that the frontal lobes of his brain, which are responsible for voluntary attention, are underdeveloped. He cannot organize himself and resist the first desire to be distracted, it is difficult for him to get back into activity.

Due to the fact that a child with ADHD first does and then thinks, he has many problems in his studies: he reads the first syllable in a word, and thinks out the rest; stretches out his hand without listening to the teacher's question; jumps up and runs away as soon as the bell rings. In addition, children with ADHD are not easy to sit still, they tend to aggressive games. True, this happens not from evil, but because of a lack of sensation of one's body. To feel it, such children constantly need to move: very quickly, sharply, hit someone, throw something - then they feel good.

If the teacher understands the problem of the child, he will know that in fact he is good, you just need to organize him, set limits, encourage him, the child will be a normal student. Children with ADHD are great at reading the right patterns of behavior - for this you just need to pay attention to other people.

How to do homework?

do together

In the initial period of education, a child with ADHD will definitely not be able to do homework without an adult. An adult for such a child is the forehead and plans activities for him. Gradually, the parent can transfer control to the child, but at the same time he must be on the alert: periodically look into the room, check whether the child is coping on his own. If not, then return to joint activities.

No distractions

When parents sit down to do their homework with their child, they should not rush anywhere, cook dinner in parallel, or endlessly respond to messages. You have to be completely owned by the child. The fussiness of the parent will automatically be transmitted to the child - he will be nervous.

Divide complex tasks into parts

The phrase “go do your homework” is incomprehensible to a child with ADHD. He cannot plan this activity and it falls apart. The instructions should be specific and broken down into stages: we sit down at the table, open the diary, read our homework, open the textbook. This is how we help the child come to a decision step by step. Gradually, this external speech control passes into the internal plan. The child begins to take these steps independently without your help.

Use a timer

Children with ADHD have a poorly developed perception of time, so they must see that time is passing. You can use an hourglass, a variety of applications where the arrow runs and the dial is painted over - so it will be easier for the child to perceive time. When a child sees that the 15 minutes allotted for mathematics expire, his activity increases.

Take breaks

Children with ADHD need them: 20 minutes of work, five minutes of rest. If the child begins to fidget, yawn, pick his nose - stop the timer and go to rest. The break in the process of completing one task should be short, no more than five minutes, since it is difficult for a child with ADHD to get back into the process. The break between tasks is usually 10–15 minutes. During breaks, all gadgets (phone, tablet, TV) are prohibited: the child needs to actively move (balancer, trampoline, horizontal bar), drink water, look out the window, eat an apple - that's enough. You can push the walls or beams of the doorway with your hands: such tension and pressure turns on the proprioceptive system, which activates all the structures of the brain.

If the child is constantly spinning in a chair, you can replace it with a fitball - this will help to concentrate. If the child slides out of the chair, anti-slip mats on the seat, under the feet and under the textbooks will help. An expander, chewing gum for hands, a ball should always be at hand: deep pressing helps to improve the energy tone in the brain.

Keep the table in order

The child should be responsible for this. There is an organizer for writing materials on the table, and nothing else. No games, magazines, books. After school, the child must make sure that everything is cleaned up. We introduce the rule: where we take, we put it there. This will help solve the organization problem that children with ADHD have. At first, you can orient the child by sticking stickers with signatures.

Refuse drafts

The big problem with a child with ADHD is that he gets exhausted quickly. If a child writes a draft, then there will not be enough strength for a clean draft. Of course, it will be difficult at first to write cleanly right away, the child will make mistakes. But this will teach him responsibility, he will try to do it qualitatively.

How to interact with teachers?

School adaptation is one of the most important goals in working with a child with ADHD, so you need to be as frank as possible with a teacher, make him your ally. Hiding the diagnosis from the teacher, parents initially put him in a position “behind the fence”. On the contrary, it is necessary to warn about an officially established diagnosis, talk about the difficulties of the child, explain that the family is interested in a good study, the child will study with specialists, and you hope for the teacher's help in adapting. If you ask the teacher for recommendations and advice, he will feel that his opinion is important to you and will be responsible for the child.

It is also important to convey to the teacher the recommendations of the neuropsychologist that relate to the child's learning process: how to interact with him in the classroom, how to respond better, how to distribute tasks for him. During the school year, you need to keep in touch with the teacher, ask about the successes and failures of the child, and also thank for the patient attitude and understanding of his problems.

If there is a conflict, it is important not to understand emotions. The first thing to do is talk to your child. You need to let the frustrated child let off steam, let them speak without interrupting or cutting off. Name his feelings, acknowledge them and reformulate the child’s words in a more constructive way: “You must be angry, scared, you are probably now afraid of the consequences.” At this moment, the child will feel relieved: he merged strong emotions, realized that you are with him. After that, you can start a more rational conversation: understand the reasons, analyze the whole situation, put everything in its place and discuss further actions.

The next step is to discuss what happened together with the teacher. It is important for the parent to remain neutral, speak constructively, listen to all points of view and try to resolve the conflict. It is very important to always be on the side of the child and maintain a trusting relationship so that he wants to tell you about his conflicts, and not hide them. It is important to support the child, but not to justify: so he will know that, no matter what happens, you will help him cope with emotions and resolve the conflict.

It's been a little over a month since the beginning of the school year, and teachers in many classrooms are facing similar problems: children, usually boys, don't listen in class, do what they want, and have difficulty controlling themselves. Today, these children are called hyperactive. Can such a diagnosis be made at school? How can parents improve their child's school life?

“My son went to school this year. From birth, he was a very mobile and nervous boy, and at school his problems worsened: the teacher complains that he talks loudly in class, turns around and interferes with the whole class. Yes, he is a difficult child. The school psychologist says he has hyperactivity disorder. What it is?"

Fully this diagnosis sounds like this: attention deficit hyperactivity disorder - ADHD. Children with this syndrome are not only very mobile, talkative and fussy; they have trouble concentrating, focusing. On average, there are about three percent of children with ADHD in the world, therefore, in a class of thirty students, there may well be such a child.

When do ADHD symptoms appear? It is believed that this occurs before the age of seven, although sometimes they may first appear at the age of ten or eleven. Most often, parents of first-graders turn to the doctor: “Everyone is sitting quietly, but mine can’t!”. However, some clarify: "But in fact, it was very difficult with him from birth."

Pointy Temperament

In general, mindfulness and activity are properties of temperament, and in this sense, all people are divided into those who can be concentrated for a long time, can do hard work, and those who cannot stand such work. The diagnosis of ADHD means that these properties of temperament are extremely sharp, so that a person cannot fit into a normal life, unable to fulfill the tasks that others and himself put before him, and this greatly interferes with full-fledged relationships with parents and friends.

Now often any impulsive, very mobile baby, without hesitation, is called hyperactive. However, only a doctor can diagnose ADHD. It is impossible to determine by eye whether a child has ADHD or just throws a tantrum. To make a diagnosis, it is necessary to carefully assess the life and development of the child, to trace how and in what situations his problems of attentiveness and activity manifest themselves.

The level of activity can be determined by special scales that parents fill out, and the doctor compares how much the indicators of a particular child differ from the standard ones. These scales are based on serious studies conducted in the US and Europe. The norms in them, however, are American and European. In my work, I rely on them, albeit with caution.

Not a personality disorder

The first thing parents need to know is that ADHD is not a mental illness, but a developmental disorder. It's just that the child's self-control function is initially impaired. Most often, he does not get sick with this - he is already born that way. Parents often ask me: “Did we overlook something, did we not do something on time?”. No. The parents are not to blame. If we could look into the brain of such a child, we would see that those areas that are responsible for self-control, for controlling behavior, work differently for him than for others.

The paradox is that these children look absolutely normal. So he asks for forgiveness and promises to improve, but over and over again he breaks his promises - and they begin to consider him spoiled ... I ask one boy: “What are you talking about in class?” And he replies: "Yes, I forget that it is impossible." Children with ADHD forget the rules and behave on impulse. Parents who know this are easier to forgive such a child, do not hang all sorts of labels on him and, I hope, do not blame themselves needlessly.

There can be several reasons for ADHD. For example, heredity. Research suggests that about half of children with this diagnosis have at least one parent with ADHD. It is also known that children with low weight or low Apgar scores immediately after birth are more likely to develop ADHD.

props

Unfortunately, there is no way to cure ADHD once and for all. But the development of the child largely depends on the behavior of the parents. Understanding what the problem is, they are able to make his life much easier. Having made this diagnosis, I consider it my main task to explain to my parents what is happening.

The most effective thing you can do to make life easier for a child with ADHD is to build a system of external control for him.

1. Children with ADHD find it difficult to keep a large amount of information in their heads. This means that the tasks for them should break into pieces. Did one thing - get a new task.
2. Children with ADHD are known to have problems with sense of time. They are "short-sighted to the future." If we can plan our activities and roughly imagine what it will lead to, then children with ADHD have a “window in time” of ten minutes maximum. They live exclusively in the moment, they do not represent the consequences. Therefore, if “something not right” occurs as a result of their actions, this is not their choice, they did not want these consequences.
   At the same time, such a child is in dire need of immediate feedback from the parents. And in this case, he needs the consequences here and now. The approach will not work with him: “If you keep order in your room for a month, we will give you a bicycle” or “If you don’t sit down for lessons right away, your father will return in the evening and punish you.” Evening is a kind of vague future. It’s better to say this: “If you do this right now, you can get such and such immediately.”
   It is very difficult for such children at school. They have to sit for forty minutes without distraction and do classwork, and the mark will appear only two days later, when the teacher checks the notebooks. In such a situation, it is difficult to concentrate, because the result and the reward are very far away.
3. Works well with these kids "point" or "token" system. For the performance of daily activities, the child receives rewards in the form of points or tokens, which they then exchange for something. So he constantly sees the result of his actions, understands that his opportunities increase every time and with every deed.
4. Application of timers. They help children who have trouble keeping track of time. You can use an ordinary hourglass.
   There is another beautiful thing - a watch that has a colored circle on the dial, and along with the passing minutes, this circle disappears. With this watch you can see "live" how time passes. After all, the child himself does not feel that it is ending, and because of this he puts off things.
5. When visiting public places, for example, clinics, you need to think in advance what the child will do for an hour or two, especially if the mother is busy. Stock up on paper, felt-tip pens and toys. It would be useful to take a relative to help.
   Unfortunately, adults often react reactively: they put the child in a situation in which he is likely to have problems, and then they begin to scold him.
6. Should I take medication for ADHD? Parents should discuss this issue with a specialist. Of course, medication use has its pros and cons, but in the vast majority of cases, I strongly advise you to at least try the treatment, because the effect can be significant. However, be sure to check with your doctor if the medicine he prescribes has undergone clinical trials for effectiveness. Unfortunately, the vast majority of drugs prescribed in our country for ADHD have not passed such tests.

ADHD and others

One of the problems that parents of children with ADHD face is the lack of awareness among society, teachers and even some professionals. But most importantly, the parents themselves must clearly understand what they are dealing with.

Just saying to a teacher, “You know, my child has ADHD,” is like saying nothing. It is necessary to describe the child's behavior very specifically, for example: “It is very difficult for my son to sit still, it is difficult to restrain himself, he has had this for a long time, we have tried a lot of things, now we go to the doctor, we are doing this, but I am afraid that he will spin in class and even talk ... I really want him to have good behavior. Let's agree: I will come up to you for a minute every day after the lessons, and you will tell me what and how he did it.

You need to take teachers as your allies. Otherwise, it happens that both sides, both teachers and parents, only complain: “These parents do not want to do anything, the whole burden is on us”, “These teachers do not understand anything about our child, they only spread rot.” Of course, this and that happens, and quite often, but it is more effective to work together.

As they grow older, the ability to self-control, the ability to manage their behavior in any child improves. Fussiness, mobility, talkativeness usually decrease by the end of elementary school. Slightly slower impulsiveness decreases.

Of course, people learn to restrain themselves, but they continue to be impulsive and quick-tempered. Problems associated with a lack of attention and concentration usually remain and accompany these people into adulthood. But then at least there is an opportunity to choose what to do.

There are many professions that are quite suitable for a person with self-control problems. It is known that, for example, in the United States, people with ADHD willingly go to the army (there are, according to some estimates, more than ten percent of them), because the army implies clear rules and frameworks, a clear structure, prescribed duties and physical activity.

On the one hand, it is difficult to blame the parents, because you would not wish anyone to be in such a situation. It's a lot of work raising children with ADHD. But it’s better not to forget: complex behavior is by no means a free choice of a child. Not so long ago, I was approached by a married couple who had already raised two children. The third, born much later, was diagnosed with ADHD. And the husband and wife said to me: “You know, for a long time we considered ourselves wonderful parents and took credit for raising wonderful children. Only now we have understood: it is easy to bring up "light" children, but try to bring them up.