If you feel. How to understand how you feel

Sometimes a day comes in a woman's life when she wants to break a mirror, crawl under the covers, grabbing a box of eclairs, and complain about her female unattractiveness. Eclairs, of course, will not add attractiveness, but they will sweeten the bitterness of imperfection.

And I have for you a selection of 99% psychologist's advice on how to increase your attractiveness. Why 99%? Yes, because I leave 1% to those who prefer to go for a second box of eclairs instead of following the advice.

If you feel unattractive

In the first place in terms of efficiency is self-confidence and self-confidence... This feeling is complemented by a beautiful gait, a straight back, a raised head and a triumphant smile. What can you do to feel attractive? Just believe in yourself!

In second place in the guide to getting rid of your own unattractiveness is - and this is predictable! - change of image, image, appearance... No radical methods, just with the help of an experienced stylist. When you see yourself, transformed, in the mirror, you will be 100% sure of your attractiveness. And the glances of passers-by and compliments from colleagues will not keep themselves waiting long and remove the last doubts.

In third place is the most pleasant recommendation: photo session with an excellent photographer... Several thoughtful looks, a glass of wine or something stronger for sparkle of eyes, a little coquetry and liberation ... Add to this the skill of a photo artist - and for the first week you will look at your photos several times a day. And you will definitely want to register with a marriage agency so that thousands of free men would see your photos. It's no secret that it is high-quality photographs that help you get married successfully.

Nestled comfortably in fourth place smile... I don’t know women who wouldn’t like a smile. But I know many who smile made mysterious, enigmatic, glowing from within. An interesting fact: men on dating sites stop looking at the photos of those women who smile or even laugh, because a smile is the simplest way to radiate attractiveness and invite you to a closer acquaintance.

In fifth place - communication... Maximum communication. You can start by communicating on forums, in chats, on dating sites - where the interlocutor is judged by the conversation, and not by appearance. Learn to be witty, sarcastic, sympathetic, and funny. Change your mood depending on who you are talking to and on what topics. And when you realize that people with you are interested, that they are waiting for your letters or messages, that they listen to your opinion and laugh at your jokes - congratulations, this is a success! Victory over your perceived unattractiveness.

Do you agree that you are incredibly attractive and damn charming? ;-)

They say when you meet your man, you just understand and feel it. But what exactly will you feel?

1. You will feel ready.

When you end one relationship, you are in no hurry to start new ones, because you are afraid of getting burned again. You don't want to risk your heart again, you just want a quiet life.

But when you meet the right person, everything will make sense again. You will feel that you are ready to open up to this person, without fear that he may hurt you. Just something will click between you, and you will feel that you have met a kindred spirit.

2. You will feel that he respects your emotional needs.

When you meet the right person, he will respect everything in you. When you are sad, he will try to calm you down or just leave you alone if you want to. On the other hand, when you are happy, he will try to double your happiness by supporting you and rejoicing for you.

3. You will have the same view of the future.

It is very important that the couple have the same vision of their future. The problem begins when you want one thing and he wants another, but if you are absolutely compatible in your goals and dreams, then you are on the way.

4. You can be yourself with him.

It is very important to be able to relax with your loved one. If you feel that you can not pretend to be around him, that you can be yourself, then you are in luck! If he accepts you for who you are, then he loves you with all your flaws. He loves the real you, and this is the most important thing.

5. You feel happy.

The best way to know that you've met the right person is to pay attention to your emotions. If you feel like the happiest person on earth, there is no doubt that he is your half.

6. You will feel that you are getting better around him.

This is a great sign! If he reveals the best in you, you will feel that you made the right choice for yourself by choosing him. You will be proud that he is with you, and you will not want to let him go.

7. Your intuition will tell you that he is your only one.

There may be many different signs that a person is right for you, but if you don't feel it inside yourself, everything is in vain. If you see the sparkle in his eyes, when he looks at you, how he touches you, how he gently kisses and caresses, then you will understand that he is your half. Women have a sixth sense, so you really just feel. Yes, we can fall in love with the wrong person, but even then, deep down, we know it’s wrong. You just need to not be afraid to follow your inner voice.

The most important thing that can connect two people is truth, sincerity, openness.
In everything, always. And I will tell you, honestly: when a person openly confesses to you his doubts, fears about you, this is much more valuable than saying the worn-out "I love you, you are very dear to me."

This kind of openness hurts self-esteem very much. How? I? How can you not trust me? This level of sincerity puts an adrenaline rush right into the core of your ego.

That is why not everyone is ready to listen to the truth. After all, as you know, she stabs the eyes and undermines the unshakable self-esteem about herself. This is why most people's reactions to the truth are so painful. After all, you step on his ego with your sincerity to a person.

Therefore, sincerity is the responsibility of both. The first gathers up courage and speaks, very carefully choosing the words that most closely reflect his feelings. The second - gains courage and listens, looks inward, realizes the tingling sensations of his own ego and tries to understand and feel the pain and doubts of his neighbor.

I assure you, when you move from the position of "I and my point of view" to the position of "he / she and his / her feelings and perception", then an important transformation will take place with you in the first place. There will be a flash, a surge of energy inside each of the partners, and this will lead to the realization of an even deeper connection between you.

Words. Words.

In relationships, I have developed one very simple rule - always feel the soul, and then try to understand the words.

Words are an imperfect, shaky foundation on which it is hardly possible to build anything solid. If you rely on words in a relationship, then you have every chance of experiencing severe disappointment.

Therefore, a mantra appeared in my life: "Tell me, how do you feel? Every time I want to get closer to the joint truth between me and my beloved, I ask her this question."

This question immediately draws her attention to her feelings and sensations, which cannot be conceptualized. They are what they are, and she begins to tell me about them.

At first, hesitant, shy, and then more and more natural and natural. Truth transforms both of us. It allows you to immerse yourself, see the world of your neighbor and get to know him better, and thereby get rid of the bundle of illusory ideas about your neighbor.

Sincerity is sex with your partner's soul. Impulsive, sensual. Saturated with energy, which writes out unimaginable somersaults inside.

Sincerity is wonderful! Sometimes it makes everything inside tingle with pain, but after going through this, seeing life through the eyes of your loved one, you give birth to something more than just an emotional attachment. Gleb Efimenko - Kogan.

The feeling of love comes suddenly - it seems to cover your head. The loved one seems ideal, the best in the world. And they are ready to live their whole life with him and never be separated. But not every feeling of love is durable, often it is replaced by an ordinary attachment to a person.

Instructions

How do you sort out your feelings and understand whether you love or live with each other through a strong habit?
First, you should find out why such thoughts came to your mind, for sure you began to dislike something in the relationship. And this is understandable, because after some time of living together, passion dulls, there is no novelty of emotions, so the relationship becomes quite calm and monotonous. This can cause boredom and thoughts that love is long gone. Is it worth living together then?

Don't jump to conclusions. The fact that you are now not experiencing every minute outbursts of passion, as in those days when you started dating, is a natural phenomenon. But it doesn’t mean that love is over. It's just that your feeling has moved to a new, more mature level. One must be able to preserve it.

Psychologists identify several signs of family relationships, by which you can understand whether you still love each other or live by affection. Your partner is imperfect, but you are happy with him.
For example, you have always dreamed of being an athlete and activist, but you married a homebody who spends his free time reading magazines and books. When the first emotional decline of your feelings passes, you begin to soberly assess your partner, clearly see all his shortcomings and habits that you did not notice during the period of passionate love. At this very time, it is worth deciding for yourself whether you can live with the shortcomings of your beloved. Moreover, it is precisely not to get along and endure, but to live happily and calmly, accepting a person as he is.

You feel confident and comfortable with the person.
You are not worried that now you do not walk all night long, and your husband does not climb into your bedroom through an open window. You understand that the couple has other joys. You are happy that your beloved, returning from work, does not forget to buy you your favorite cookies, that you fall asleep on his shoulder every night. Of course, in married life there is a place for unusual impressions and emotions. It all depends on you and your imagination. Do not think that family life is boring and monotonous. You just love and appreciate your chosen one, even if he does not suit you with daily grandiose entertainment.

Love is built on mutual respect.
A dismissive attitude can kill even the strongest feelings. If spouses truly love each other, they will try to find compromises in controversial situations.

Love builds self-confidence.
Having a reliable, loving "rear", you can conquer more and more new peaks for yourself. The support of a loved one is what gives us strength, instills confidence in the future.

Speaking about love, it is worth saying a few words about habit. Is the situation really so hopeless when you understand that there is no more love, only attachment remains? It often happens that love passes, people quickly part and forget about each other. But it can be very difficult to let go of a person you are used to. Habit is a terrible force.
Therefore, before you ruin a relationship, think about whether your habit is just another form of love.

note

It is worth recognizing that love has passed if you stop associating everything with one particular person. Spain becomes just a country, not a place where you spent your vacation together, but a piece of jewelry that he gave, just a piece of jewelry that you don't want to wear every day anymore. You notice a couple of lovers and you are well aware that you are no longer like them.

Useful advice

How to understand that love has passed? What contributed to this? Let's figure it out. Scientists have identified hormones that are responsible for every stage of a love relationship. They also proved that love is not eternal. How long does love go through? Representatives of the older generation can answer: "Love lives for three years." And they turn out to be right, although they rely only on life experience, not science.

Loving someone is wonderful, but not always everything is clear and understandable. For example, you are dating a girl, and your relationship seems to be building well, but you are not sure whether you love your soul mate, or is it just an affair that will end soon.

This uncertainty is a little scary, prevents you from living peacefully and sleeping at night. It is imperative to understand this issue. But how to understand your feelings for a person?

It's just that sympathy is sold for analysis, but warmer feelings are not.

You yourself can easily determine whether you like this or that person. It is just pleasant for you to be together, to communicate, but your heart does not skip when a person you like enters the room, you don’t miss him, well, or almost don’t miss him. But if you are tormented trying to answer the question "Do I love this girl?", It is more and more difficult here, because love cannot be analyzed, it is a complex multifaceted feeling, not an emotion.

Retire

You will not be able to understand this issue if the person you love (or only you think so) is sitting in front of you. And in general, no other people, pets should be around at the time of your thoughts. Eliminate extraneous sounds - turn off the radio, TV, computer so as not to hear the buzzing of the cooling system fans.

Think about the person with whom you need to determine the feelings. What emotions do you feel when you think about a girl - positive, negative, and maybe neutral or no emotions at all? Do you want to be with her now? It is possible that all these reflections and the search for answers will take more than one evening, but you will finally sort out your feelings.

Live together

Are you dating a girl now? And you try to rent an apartment and live there together for several months. Imagine that you are already married. If you are driven simply by passion or love, you will not be able to stand it for a long time, everyday life will surely finish you, and the girl will appear for you in a new light. You suddenly find out that she, for example, does not know how to cook or does not bother with housework at all. And here your feelings will be seriously tested. If you, despite all the difficulties of life together, will still love a person, as before, then you have real love.

Can't understand if a man is in love with you? Look a man in the eye to see how he is feeling! Unlike words, a glance never lies.

The eyes are the mirror of the soul, and the soul, as you know, never lies. Words can hide our true feelings, but eyes can never. Especially when it comes to the look of a man in love. The ability to read by the eyes is a very useful activity that every girl should master, because this is the only way you can understand what your partner is really experiencing.

Want to know how a man feels about you? Just look into his eyes! Here are some tips to help you read the truthful answer in them.

How do you know how a man feels about you?

The direction of his gaze

To inspire confidence in a person, psychologists advise looking into his eyes during a conversation. However, if the interlocutor does not arouse our sympathy, it is incredibly difficult to do this, and the gaze now and then glides around. And on the contrary - if a person is pleasant and interesting to us, we literally cannot take our eyes off his eyes, trying to catch not only the words, but also the emotions of our counterpart.

When communicating with a girl who arouses the most tender feelings in a man, he unconsciously establishes direct eye contact with her. This is a common psychological reaction that cannot be controlled. When an object of interest to us falls into our field of vision, we direct all our attention to it, trying not to miss a single trifle.

Duration of eye contact

According to psychological studies, when talking with friends, colleagues, relatives or acquaintances, people look each other in the eyes for about 50% of the total conversation time. If the dialogue is between two lovers, the duration of eye contact increases to 80%. At the same time, the look acquires intimacy and softness, as if people want to become even closer to each other.

To understand whether a man is in love with you or whether there is only flirting on his part, pay attention to where his gaze is directed in the intervals of a conversation. When a man is really interested in a girl, he looks at her face most of the time. If his gaze drops lower, wandering around your figure, his thoughts are occupied with fantasies of intimacy with you.

That is why men often do not remember the details of our image or features of our appearance. For example, if you ask a man who recently talked to a girl he liked what she was wearing, he most likely won’t remember, because during the conversation his attention was focused on her eyes and face.

Dilated pupils

Love affects our body like a drug. At least these two phenomena have one thing in common - dilated pupils. When a man looks at his girlfriend, his pupils involuntarily dilate. This is due to the strong emotions that are now raging in his heart.

Concentration of attention

In a normal conversation, the duration of uninterrupted eye contact is on average 5-6 seconds, after which the gaze involuntarily "runs away" to the side. But the look of a man in love acquires special concentration and attentiveness.

During a conversation, the main object of male attention is the girl, so now he is not interested in what is happening around. If at this moment something happens that makes you switch your attention, the process of averting your gaze proceeds with a slight slowdown.

As a rule, during normal flirting, a man is not so focused. With superficial interest, a man looks into the eyes of his interlocutor only when he speaks himself, as if reading the reaction to his monologue in his gaze. When a girl connects to the conversation, his gaze involuntarily falls down or to the side.

Raised eyebrows

A slightly raised eyebrow gesture is a sign of sympathy and trust. Raising his eyebrows, a man subconsciously says that he believes your every word and wants you to believe him too.

Together with the raised eyebrows, the man's lips involuntarily stretch into a smile, and the body leans forward slightly. As part of non-verbal communication, all these gestures occur unconsciously and cannot be controlled.

Associated gestures

In addition to the "bottomless" look, a man in love will be given several accompanying gestures. For example, when a guy is overwhelmed with feelings, he unobtrusively touches the object of his passion, narrows the distance, and also uses gestures of "preening" - straightens his hair or shirt collar. Translated from non-verbal language, all this means only one thing - a man is in love and he wants you to experience exactly the same feelings for him.

The look of a man in love is like a bottomless ocean. Even if he has not yet uttered the cherished words, you will surely feel his love, because he will reward you with the most special look.

How to understand that you are in love and not in love. How to understand if a loved one loves you

If with all questions concerning a person it is best to approach and ask, then, as far as sympathy is concerned, this method may not work, because out of a feeling of embarrassment, you may be answered that they do not like, but out of a desire not to offend, let them know that they love. However, there are several indirect signs if doubts remain about the spoken or not spoken confession. Deeds that betray a person's attitude are always much more eloquent. If you notice that they care about you, always remember events or plans that are significant for you, help or try to please, then this is definitely about sincere sympathy. But in assessing actions, make an amendment to how a loved one perceives the world, it is likely that he will show his signs of attention in a different way than you would (if in your case these are constant SMS messages, then he may, on the contrary, not write, caring so as not to bother you).

Perhaps the most important sign of serious love is building joint plans. When your relationship is long, then plans should be big, about a common home and children, and for the initial stage, plans for weekends and holidays are good. If this does not happen, then the conversation can be initiated on your own, since the person is afraid to frighten you off with his serious attitude (after all, many girls believed the magazine articles and simply do not talk about plans in order not to frighten off their loved one).

The fact that you were introduced to your circle of friends, and possibly relatives, indicates a serious positioning of your relationship, and when you are introduced to new acquaintances as your soul mate, then this is love. If you notice that in public he withdraws, and represents you neutrally, then either you have chosen an extremely secretive and stern man, or he is not defined in his feelings.

I want to share with my beloved, and this should include not only material things, but also friends and time, advice from experience and mood. The desire to share your and joyful participation in your life with you speaks of love, but the separation of spheres with a clear definition without the desire to unite, shows a person's unwillingness to open up.

In order to express love, it is not necessary to pronounce this word, but such an attitude should be felt, and if you have doubts, then try to talk cleanly.

All of the above signs of falling in love lie in the material plane. These are the conclusions that follow from the specific words and actions of a man. But you can understand that a guy is hiding feelings without resorting to complex psychological analysis. It is enough to observe how he looks at his beloved girl.

The look of a man in love without words gives out sincere sympathy. He is unable to control himself, the call of nature makes him look at the object of his adoration with “crimson eyes”. In such a look, admiration and delight are easily read. He views a woman as a beautiful picture, admiring every movement and bend of the body. Sometimes, spellbound, freezes for a moment, as if plunging into a trance.

Subjects with strong psychological training try to hide this expressive feature. Realizing that it is indecent to constantly look at the lady, they begin to "encrypt": to cast frequent glances on the sly. But cover tactics will reveal themselves sooner or later.

Sometimes people find it difficult to determine exactly what feelings they have for a person. Love gives way to hatred, then indifference, affection, passion, distrust rule the ball in the soul. In a word, it is so easy to get confused in the whole gamut of feelings and emotions and give them some kind of clear definition. How do you realize exactly what you feel about a particular person?

If the attitude towards a person lends itself to at least some kind of logical analysis, then the situation with feelings is much more complicated and confusing. Not all people easily identify their emotions, personal feelings, and feelings. But you need to learn to listen to yourself, to your inner voice and intuition.

To do this, you need complete concentration, lack of hustle and bustle. It is best to define your inner feelings alone, when nothing distracts you from the process of comprehending the great secret of your soul. Think about the person you are interested in and try to understand exactly how your heart feels about him. Do you feel positive emotions, or vice versa? Do you want to be with him or not? You may need to think about this for a few days or even weeks, but the result you arrive at will be fairly accurate.

In addition, it is quite easy to convince yourself of the depth of your feelings if you live with a person you like for a while. It is in everyday life that the compatibility of two people is comprehended, as well as their ability to change, adjusting to each other. You can be mistaken for a long time, naively believing that you are madly in love with your partner, but a few months spent together can easily and simply dispel this myth. But if you are dealing with a real soul mate, then no quarrels, trials and obstacles will allow you to throw him out of your life.

Therefore, try to communicate as often as possible with the person of the opposite sex you are interested in. Only in this way will you be able to comprehend the facets of his character unknown to you, which can both increase your sympathy for him and kill all feelings. If you begin to experience severe discomfort in communication, you may decide to break this connection, or you may want to change yourself in order to maintain your relationship. In any case, it is not at all the reason and not the advice of friends and relatives that will help you make the right decision in the field of love and emotions. Listen only to your soul, which will not deceive you.

Of course, we would need a kind of indicator that would allow us to determine whether it is love or not. However, wise scientists have not yet invented such a device, which is why we will “identify” interest, affection, sex, sympathy and love according to certain signs and parameters.

Method number 1. Test

Can't figure out your own experiences and feelings? Answer a few simple questions:

1. Do you think about him (her) before falling asleep, want to wish him pleasant dreams?
2. Are you striving to make him happy?
3. Do you feel good, calm next to your chosen one?
4. When you think about him, smile, blush and worry?
5. Are you counting the hours until you meet him?
6. Do you think he is the best man (woman)?
7. You know about all his shortcomings, but continue to accept him for who he is?
8. Does the prolonged separation from him bother you?

If you answered all the questions with a confident “yes”, congratulations, your feelings are sincere. When there is uncertainty in the answers, it is worth considering. Remember that the test should be taken in its normal state, avoiding special joys and quarrels.

Method number 2. Pros and cons

A common psychological method is to divide a sheet of paper into two columns and write down the positive and negative qualities of your chosen one. So you can get your real attitude towards him and a vision of his personality.

Analyze the number of pros and cons. What is your loved one woven from? Of the merits or demerits? The predominance of positive qualities is another joyful evidence of your love and good relationship to your partner.

Method number 3. Meditation

It is more comfortable to sit in an easy chair, on a carpet pleasant to the body - you will have to spend half an hour on it. In addition, there should be no distractions or extraneous thoughts. Getting into a "trance" is easier to accomplish by focusing on your own breathing.

Having calmed down and detached from extraneous thoughts, imagine this person. Happened? How do you feel? Do you feel like walking up, kissing, hugging, or running away? Decide on all your feelings (negative and positive) that arise when the image of a loved one appears.

Method number 4. "He is no more"

Rough enough, but effective technique. Try to imagine that your chosen one is no longer with you (you do not need to dwell on this idea). Or perhaps you've never met at all. What are you thinking about? Are such performances comfortable? Or perhaps they only bring you pain and discomfort? We understand the significance of any thing or person when we no longer possess them. The result of reflection will be an understanding of what feelings you have for your chosen one.

If apathy and blues are covered due to PMS or banal fatigue, there are no problems. You can easily get over it all in a couple of days with a bucket of ice cream and a vanilla movie - you yourself know.

But when indifference to life drags on, and even not for a week ... This needs to be dealt with. Most of all, the Universe does not like when we waste our time.

Some people may simply suffer from a mental disorder in which they are not able to recognize and read the emotional background of situations, their feelings and other people.

But you understand that such a minority.

Insensitivity is not a cause, but a consequence of a problem that has been driven into the farthest corner - just not to be solved.

And everything is quite understandable: unsuccessful relationships, disappointments in people, neuroses, stress at work, suppressed emotions, complexes, an excess of other people's opinions and desires in life.

The ability to “be environmentally friendly” and correctly experience emotions is a real job, a valuable skill that a woman simply needs.

An attentive attitude to your feelings allows you to understand yourself, adequately analyze and evaluate your actions and reactions to different life situations.

When is it normal to be insensitive, and when is the alarm to sound? Let's find out.

Neuroses and stress

While our society quietly laughed at the Americans, who approached the psychologist with or without reason, we managed to amass and bottle up in ourselves an unimaginable number of problems and unrealized emotions.

The psyche of each of us needs the same basic hygiene as our body.

No work on yourself will be successful, no affirmations will make you enlightened, if your only and main thought is to sleep, for example.

Modern women have driven themselves into the framework of strength and independence, they have not learned to take energy for all this - and they do not allow themselves to rest.

They live in a state of extreme physical and moral exhaustion, and then they wonder why they do not feel attraction or love. Nothing.

Work on your past, on negative attitudes in order to be better tomorrow than today. It is necessary - no doubt about it. But if you don't feel anything, go on vacation.

For many years now I have been repeating to myself and my team: "Desire has thousands of possibilities, unwillingness has thousands of reasons."

Think, why is it profitable and convenient for you somewhere deep inside to suffer and think, "Why don't I feel anything?", "Why am I not lucky with men?"

If you dig deep, you will find the answer. Take it with you on vacation for a week. And you don't have to fly to the Maldives for that. It is enough to spend time with yourself and for your benefit.

If you understand the mechanisms of work of your unconscious and know your weak points.

I am not urging you to quit your job instantly, but if you do the same things and expect a different result, this is a losing strategy in advance. So first, let your psyche rest and recover.

Correct experience

The ability to openly and clearly express or realize your feelings -

In childhood, we were all told at least once: “don't laugh so loudly”, “don't shout”, “behave yourself”. Yes, these moments concerned upbringing and behavior in society.

But similar formulations, like those that teach a child from early childhood to suppress and hide their emotions, to block reactions.

While you're on vacation

The ability and ability to feel is a purely female prerogative. And often she is directly related to the awareness of her femininity and acceptance of her feminine principle.

Try the following exercise. It will help track your relationship with men - if your insensitivity is related to past experiences of unsuccessful relationships.

For the next week, look those in the eye. And remember how you feel.

You can even start a notebook in which you will describe your feelings. Incredibly, you will be surprised when you realize that you feel shame, lack of dignity, fear, or other negativity.

Do you want a more difficult task? Look in the eyes, smile and wave your pen. Here you can feel the whole range of emotions. Especially when a man smiles back and walks in your direction to.

And one more important point worth mentioning. Never evaluate your feelings and emotions, because this is the voice of your soul.

Firstly, nature is allowed to a person not only to smile permanently, but sometimes to cry or get angry. If we didn’t need it, evolution in us would not have implanted these feelings as well.

Secondly, the most important life experience is to wean oneself from reflection, not to be led by situations and other people, not to fall for emotional hooks, etc.

By the way, fear or aversion to manifestations of negative emotions is another reason why you can be completely emotionless. Tears, sweat, redness, tremors - not as aesthetically pleasing as they show in the movies, but we do not live in a fairy tale.

And real life is about different experiences, not just about sheer joy. Otherwise, we would simply not learn anything.

If in childhood your mother only dressed you in trousers and insisted that you must achieve everything yourself, the disclosure of your female potential will be a real miracle for you. This is a very difficult but pleasant work on yourself.

Or another example - if after an unsuccessful relationship you decided that all "men are goats", then after working through this conviction, you will give yourself a chance for, real feelings and emotions, which means happiness for a woman.

I don't like nobody

A phrase that I increasingly hear from modern women. Translating it into simple and honest language: "I don't like those who like me." And there are three reasons why you don't feel anything for the men around you.

The first possible one - you are fixated on an ideal, a fictional image that is convenient for you.

To provide for the family, and spend a lot of time with you, and, and so that you travel once a month and that flowers every week, and gifts every day.

Sorry, but what will you do in the midst of all this holiday, where is your area of ​​responsibility in this relationship?

Yes, male attention, flowers and gifts are important for a woman. But you need to go down to earth and become the one for which a man wants to do it.

Last season's shirt or a man's slight shyness can easily be the reason for your rejection. No. No. And again no. After all, you are looking for the ideal.

Honey, I'll tell you a secret - there are no perfect people. Each has its own nuances. And if he put on a shirt from last season and was a little embarrassed on the first date, this is not an argument not to go on the second.

Striving for perfection - must clearly fit into the framework of adequacy, otherwise it is fraught with complete loneliness.

And we need a woman capable of providing support, love and the very "rear". While he "gets mammoths" for her happiness and comfort as well.

The second reason why you may have problems with feelings is a banal fear of relationships. For example, the divorce of parents and the lack of examples of happy families in front of your eyes and voila - the fear of relationships is right there.

Is it possible to get rid of the fear of intimacy? Of course. You don't need to fight it, you just need to understand the mechanism of fear.

How are brave people different from ordinary people? Everyone is scared, but the self-sufficient act, while others live in their fears.

Being brave does not mean stopping a galloping horse and putting out a hut, it means being honest with yourself and acting.

The third reason you don't like anyone is because you only hang out with one type of man. Think of your ex - you will find a lot of common qualities in them in different modifications.

I must say right away that if you are surrounded by alone, the question is definitely in you.

It is not at all correct to judge oneself as a woman by one type of men, to label oneself as “gray mouse”, “blue stocking” and “loneliness”.

Therefore, you need to "work out" yourself in order to go beyond the usual circle. You can't sit in a swamp and wait for someone to come and save you, suddenly making you happy and emotional.

You need to pull yourself out and go to new people in order to receive new emotions.

Feelings are muscles

If you don't train them, they become flabby and lifeless. If you don't move at all, they simply atrophy.

But you need to act according to the scheme: "experienced emotion - embodied." If you have taken the path, having worked through all of the above, you will learn to create the world around you with the help of emotions.

A “warm” emotional background and a state of femininity are the main keys to starting a happy relationship.

I believe in your happiness
Yaroslav Samoilov