Respect. Why are some people respected and others not? Why do we respect people
Have you ever noticed that good people are often not respected? They help others, are patient, do not harbor grudges, but for some reason they constantly feel upset and lonely. Psychologists believe that the reason for this is a mistake in the behavior of such people. Today we will help you figure them out.
Useless sacrifice
You ignore your own needs for the sake of others, but the world simply does not notice it. And even if people insult you, you consider yourself guilty. This approach will inevitably lead to the fact that people will upset you again and again. Do not be afraid to tell the world if you do not like something. This will help attract people with the same interests as you. On the other hand, most often no one notices unnecessary self-sacrifice.
Lack of self-esteem
You do not seem to feel when other people are rude to you, or just close your eyes to these "little inconveniences." But naturally rude people will never love or respect you for this. So why do you continue to endure this? If someone behaves as if he doesn't give a damn about you, then that’s really true. Do not look for excuses for rude people. Respect yourself.
You depend on the approval of others
People who have a pathological need for approval from others subconsciously give out signals that something is wrong with them. But others do not want to communicate with people who are somewhat different from them. Stop waiting for praise. You do not need to hear about how good you are to be a real person. And don't be afraid of criticism. People will criticize you for almost everything for one reason or another. Your opinion of yourself should always be the most important.
You are looking for a source of problems only within yourself
You automatically think that everyone around you is right, except when it comes to you. You think that you yourself are responsible for everything that happens around. Remember that no one will thank you for this, but can take advantage of you and make your life even more difficult. The search for the guilty is an ungrateful task. It will not bring you neither love nor pity. Better focus your efforts on finding a solution to the problem.
Boasting
If you constantly try to emphasize your merits and ask for respect, then you are in a dependent relationship. The more you try to convince others that you are a good person, the more often you will be refused. Even if you really are.
You can show others that you are worth something only if you yourself truly believe in it. If you know your worth, you will not need to prove it to anyone.
Fear of failure
You do not want to upset anyone, even if it is related to your inconvenience. You pretend that everything is in order, so that others do not worry if something does not suit you. As a result, you are very often unhappy with what is happening around.
Do not be afraid to say no. Even the best people in the world can try to use you if you let them do it. Help others only if you really want to.
Ignoring one's own interests
You are accustomed to adapt to the needs of other people, so it is difficult for you to understand your own desires. You yourself cannot decide what to do, so you always listen to an opinion from the outside. If you are unable to make decisions and feel helpless, other people are unlikely to respect you. Learn to listen to your own desires and don't be afraid that you can offend others. Most likely, your fears are far from reality, and you can always find a compromise.
You cannot define the limits
You always forgive others, because it is easier to do than to stand up for yourself. Even if others show disrespect to you, you will justify them. It is very important to define your own boundaries of acceptable behavior, so as not to let others cross them in relation to you. People who allow everything do not inspire respect.
Fear of loneliness
You turn your relationship into a cult by sacrificing yourself. Moreover, doing this makes you feel comfortable. Perhaps that is why you are only found hooligans, daffodils and egoists, because you allow yourself to be used.
Do not choose between your relationship and self-esteem. If you need to make this choice, then something has gone wrong. Be brave and don't be afraid of change. Think of loneliness as freedom, and you will never stay with yourself for long.
You think respect needs to be earned
You agree that respect should be the result of actions or behavior. As a result, you do not feel comfortable if your relationship with someone is equal, because you are firmly convinced that respect should be earned. You think that a person has value only if they have done something.
The truth is that love or respect cannot be "bought." Learn to unconditionally love and be loved, and then your relationship with other people will become much easier.
In a modern state, respect for the dignity, rights and freedoms of the individual is one of the key societies, in accordance with which there should be no intolerance to regardless of their origin, lifestyle and other distinctive features. Nevertheless, a person identifies for himself a separate circle of people worthy of respect, adhering to his own opinion.
Respect for a person most often arises if he has certain positive qualities, for example, he always tells the truth, has no bad habits, leads a healthy lifestyle and goes in for sports, is smart and makes good money, while occupying a prominent position in society. Thus, in the presence of several positive qualities at once, a person's simple respect for him can develop into admiration for him and even adoration. Such people are often appreciated by those who would like to be somewhat like them.
The actions of a person can also cause others to respect him. In modern society, those people who help others are especially valued, do not stand aside if an unpleasant situation has occurred with someone.
The role of mutual respect in society
With each other, as a rule, those people who have something in common. For example, members of the work collective, as well as students of educational institutions, most often being in good relations, listen to each other's opinions, show courtesy and every respect. At the same time, for example, athletes from one section, members of the same party, housemates and others, also relate to each other. Nevertheless, it should be remembered that any person deserves to be respected regardless of their appearance, character or actions. Failure to do so leads to an increase in selfishness and other negative aspects of people.
To earn respect, it is important not to turn away from people and try to show their best side in any situation - at school, at work, among friends and in the family.
An unpleasant, but rather common fact in is the respect of those who belong to one
Why do we respect other people? Why is it so important to respect the elders? Or what lies behind a sense of patriotism? There are countless similar questions, and it would seem that any adult can answer them. But in reality, most are lost in their answers. And all because they cannot realize the full depth of the word "respect."
That is why it is so important to understand this. After all, respect is a sense of respect, which is vital for the existence of society. Without it, it is impossible to build normal relations, and even more so to create a complete family.
The concept
Begin with what respect is. The essence of this feeling is quite difficult to convey in simple words, however, like any other manifestation of humanity. Nevertheless, it is possible to express the main idea.
So, respect is a respectful attitude towards a person, a natural phenomenon, a deity or a homeland. In order for this feeling to arise, the object of respect must have a certain set of qualities.
Respect is an impermanent feeling, it can arise, and then fade away again. It all depends on the moral and ethical values \u200b\u200bof a person, which, as you know, can change over time. Therefore, by educating these values \u200b\u200bin an individual, one can influence his sense of respect for others.
Why is it important to respect others?
In order to answer this question, we give a simple example. Suppose there are two brothers: one is kind, friendly, and respects the others; the second, on the contrary, looks down on everyone and considers himself the center of the universe. Who do you think is more likely to make real friends? Which of them is capable of sincere love?
Respect is a sure way to find a common language with other people, to show that they are not indifferent to the interlocutor. Moreover, if the opponent feels that they are treated with sincere respect, he himself is likely to answer the same.
To summarize, we can say that respect is a key element in building relationships, both love and friendship.
Moral and ethical standards in society
In modern society, there are foundations that, although not spelled out in the legislation, are still generally accepted rules. Their observance is extremely important, otherwise you can wrap the opinions of others against yourself. These rules include moral and ethical standards, for example, courtesy, restraint, neatness and so on.
According to these unspoken laws, there are categories of people that should be treated with respect, regardless of whether they are familiar or not. So, we give an example of such categories of people:
- The elderly. Given the age and number of tests passed, respect for them is justified.
- Women. All of them are future mothers, therefore they require respectful respect for themselves.
- Parents. The very fact that they gave life cannot but arouse respect.
- Teachers. Thanks to their work, many gain knowledge that can help achieve their goals.
- Colleagues. It’s an understandable choice, because you will have to work with these people for more than one year. Therefore, it is much easier when they are in the category of friends, rather than stick sticks in the wheels.
Respect for the Fatherland: its role in the formation of patriotism
Homeland is not just six letters in one word. This is what unites everyone, makes us one big family. Love for the motherland is called patriotism. But the question is: "Can it exist on love alone?" No, in order for patriotism not to run dry over the years, it must be constantly fueled by other feelings: pride, respect, appreciation.
Only by realizing the beauty of your country, its features and shortcomings, you can become a patriot. And as mentioned earlier, respect is a recognition of the merits of someone or something, respectively, without it it is impossible to instill true patriotism in yourself.
Respect must be brought up from childhood
Building respect for others is easiest in childhood. Therefore, in most cases, this responsibility rests with the parents and teachers. They should explain to the younger generation why it is necessary to respect this or that person.
From an early age, children should be taught that older people need to listen and fulfill their requirements. After all, their life experience is much larger, therefore, their advice can be useful. You should also remind them that each person is a person, which means that you need to respect him.
In general, respect for human rights is an established norm for all. Therefore, you should teach this to your children or pupils. Otherwise, in the future they may have problems communicating with other people.
Finally, we need to talk about such a thing as self-esteem. After all, how can people respect those who do not consider themselves equal to them? Therefore, you need to explain to the child that he is the same as everyone. Much more important is what is inside of him than what he is dressed in or in which house he lives.
Have you ever come across a person who behaved badly towards you and did not reckon with you? How did you feel? Were you outraged? Offended?
5. Treat yourself with respect.
It's funny, but many people expect that other people should respect them, but they do not respect themselves. Have you ever scolded yourself for no reason? Do you fully and unquestioningly love yourself? Are you exhausted by lack of sleep, poor nutrition, or something similar? If you do not respect yourself, you cannot count on the respect of others. Start by treating yourself with love. And after the love of self comes the love of others.
6. Behave as a professional.
This implies dressing well, being well-mannered, speaking correctly and abiding by etiquette. If you do not know the rules of etiquette, you need to get to know them. It will be useful to attend classes on the rules of etiquette, even if you have some idea of \u200b\u200bwhat they are teaching there. When I was a student, I attended several such classes on topics such as wine tasting, table behavior, behavior at the first meeting, and much more. I believe that they have benefited me. What is studied there is by no means a higher mathematics and what has been studied helps in practice when you know what is possible and what cannot be done in a particular situation.
7. Do not slander.
It does not matter in which field of activity - both in professional and in social communication, do not speak badly about people. Gossiping, you won’t earn the respect of others. If you have any complaints about a particular person or you don’t like what he / she is doing, talk to that person. Do not say bad things about him / her behind him, because a discussion behind him will entail further gossip and omissions. Whether you realize it or not, it will not only show you the bad side, but it will also hurt that person. Be honest and honest with the people you have to communicate with.
8. Stand up for your beliefs.
Have you met people who, without thinking, easily agree with everything that they are not told? I came across such ones, and in the end-end their consent ceases to have any meaning. Personally, I have greater respect for someone who (politely) disagrees and defends his position than for someone who always sings along with others. Only having your own opinion and thinking with your own head, you can achieve the respect of others. Do not be afraid to uphold your beliefs. At the same time, make sure that you do it politely and do not offend others.
9. Be yourself.
Continuing point 8, be yourself. It is always better to be a script of oneself than an exact likeness of someone else. People respect individuals who do not try to imitate anyone. So many people struggle to be what they are not, and in the end they lose their own face. Find yourself, understand what you are. The world needs people who are themselves, and not clones of each other.
10. Be an example to others.
Actions speak more than words. By your behavior you set an example to others? Do you adhere to established standards of behavior? Do you earn respect by reinforcing words with deeds? A person who is respected by other people, by his personal example, pushes others to good and right actions.
And you? Did any of the above suggestions resonate in your soul? Do you have any first-hand methods of gaining respect from others? Feel free to write them in the comments on the article.
"Respect. And for what can a person be respected? ”
To answer this question you need to understand the interpretation of the word “Respect”.
Respect is:
. a sense of respect for anyone or anything
. respectful attitude, i.e. showing respect
Respect is always based on the recognition of one's merits, merits, high qualities, importance, significance, value, uniqueness, etc.
Each person, for himself, chooses a number of criteria by which he will judge and further respect this or that person. In my humble opinion, a person cannot be respected for “beautiful eyes.” Here you need to learn one main principle: respect for SOMETHING.
The respect of other people must be earned.
The Bible says: “Everything and everything is recognized by deeds, and not by verbiage!”
An example is the many demagogue deputies who promise to keep the law, put schools and kindergartens in order, clean the city, etc.
"By business ... Get to know."
No one will respect a person simply because such a person exists. In fact, as I think, they respect not a person, respect his achievements.
It doesn’t matter what your surname is, whether your parents have a thick wallet, and whether you can speak beautifully.
Also, as I wrote at the beginning - they respect him for "something" ...
And this “something” is chosen by everyone.
Someone will respect the other because he is fluent in karate techniques or knows how to embroider a cross. And another person can consider karate and cross-stitching - nonsense or a waste of time. (Example.)
Many people want to be respected. Also, many people may not understand the meaning of the word “respect”, and may also simply not achieve respect in their actions (not deserve, not show themselves) and become jesters, clowns, bandits; yes by anyone. The main thing is to pay attention.
But few people think: what have you done to be respected?
It is necessary to approach any person "from scratch." That is, to give the opportunity to do something, and then decide whether you like it or not, respect it or not.
I also met people who respect literally - everyone and for everything.
Either from the breadth of the Russian soul, or from delicious vodka.
Respecting everyone means not respecting anyone. Just as you cannot love everyone. Respect should not be for status, but for specific actions.
It is impossible for a person in their right mind to respect the Nazis, terrorists, criminals, etc.
That is why I sometimes do not understand the church’s intention to convey to people some apofegmas such as: “God loves everyone” and “We need to love everyone” ... etc.
How can you love or respect these people ...? However, not for me to judge.
But I know for sure that you need to honor and respect your friends and relatives. Especially those who educate us, give us life, point the way.
You need to honor your parents. To instill a love of God.
And in general, try to get closer to a democratic society.
There will never be democracy in Russia. And it will not be not because of who is “above”, but because of the people themselves who survive in our country. Because everyone tries to make a profit only for himself. And live only for pleasure. I do not want to contradict myself and say that people respect each other. But I want people to treat others with RESPECT.
