Why can't relax? How to relax after a hard day? How to learn to relax? Advice from a psychologist.
How to relieve nervous tension and stress
Neuropsychic stress, symptoms, stages and how to relieve nervous tension in its various stages, what you need to know, treatment.
Good time to all! Let's talk about nervous tension. The stress that arises as a result of various psycho-emotional stresses is a solution to some problem or experience.
It is very important for anyone to learn in time to recognize this or that tension and to throw it off in time. To know how and what to do in a situation of light or strong stress, which can easily turn into a neurosis. First of all, this is our health, both mental and, of course, physical. After all, everything is nearby.
How to relieve stress, what methods and what generally stages of stress are. In order to control your emotions, manage them and catch yourself in a timely manner on the occurrence of tension - you need to know yourself and your individual characteristics well. Only this will allow you to respond positively and correctly and switch. And of course, this will require some strength and energy from you.
I will write in my own words, without any scientific expressions, it will be easier for me and I think it will be more clear to you.
1)
Light stress
which occurs quite often. We can experience this tension many times during the day. It arises as a result of various reasons, starting from the usual disappointment in something; irritation discontent with something not so significant; not a very disturbing, unpleasant memory 
something; excitement when meeting with some person who causes us not the best feelings.
And even when meeting with someone we like, but something may bother us. In this case, a light stress can even flow into a stronger one.
But now about light stressthat arises as a result of something unpleasant, but few significant for us. Noticed, felt this tension in the head (body), how can it be removed?
Such tension is removed quite easily, almost always we do it unconsciously - we are distracted by something that made us switch our attention and the tension is invisible to us and the very reason for its occurrence remains outside our head, without images and thought processes.
Here I think no extra words are needed, just it was important to shift your attention. And since the problem was insignificant, it was not difficult to do this for us.
But another option for the development of the situation was also possible. You have kept your attention on this unpleasant moment. Mentally hooked and began to scroll through the negative in the head, it is possible to search for an answer or simply analyze. But this situation is unpleasant for you, which means that by holding it, even if it is a minor nuisance, you are mentally tracing it in images and seeing some kind of internal dialogue with you, gradually raising tension.
Often this can happen when a person simultaneously doing some business distracted, consciously forgotten, but at the same time kept the negative within himself, in the images and feelings that he experienced then and began to experience now. At this moment, it was best to stop and let go of all this unnecessary information in my head, but it did not work out. As a result, consciously or not, you are in a state over voltage.
2) Increased voltage. A tension that noticeably takes away our strength. After some time, we will feel a decline in energy, even weakness and very possibly - unpleasant sensations in the head. Such tension arises with significant emotional experience, or if a person is in a state of thought process over a solution to some important problem for him, solves some tasks he needs, and is in a mental search for something.
In principle, this is a normal condition in which we are from time to time. Especially those people who are engaged in business, politics and many others who are in constant search, make some important decisions, etc. Yes, this is not the most beneficial stress in terms of health, but it not getting intrusive.
A person realizing that he is tired and needs to rest, he can fully collect his thoughts, let go of the problem and relax. Or, if it was some kind of nuisance, it’s enough to calmly force it out of your head and turn your attention to some kind of pleasant or requiring attention activity.
You may have to make some efforts on yourself, but it is important that this condition is controlled and, in addition, is very well suited for working on yourself, searching and analyzing yourself.
Here the main thing you need to understand for yourself, to determine the point when you start to feel significant fatigue and despite the positive or no a solution to some problem let go for a while give it to your brain relax. On a fresh mind, it is always easier to find a solution. And the problems and troubles do not look so terrible if you step back a bit and let them go.
Many do not know how to stop in time and continue to search for a solution or scrolling through troubles, hoping nevertheless to solve the problem for themselves, to find the answer so that first of all reassure yourself but thereby only bring themselves into a state of intense tension. And not only does a strong, exhausting tension arise, but also obsessive thoughts. The problem simply doesn’t get out of my head, even if you really try to switch to something, occupy yourself and thereby be distracted.
3) Strong nervous tension and obsessive thoughts.
This condition, not only does it have a very strong negative effect on the human psyche, but also on the whole organism. The nervous system is literally exhausted. And the longer this condition lasts, the more difficult it is to get out of it. The body weakens, there is a strong, both physical and mental fatigue, there is a probability of a condition.
Moreover, the more persistently and quickly you try to solve the problem, because you want to calm down as soon as possible, the faster and more exhausting you are. In this state, it is difficult to concentrate on work, concentrate attention and remember something.
In this state, we are not able to solve and look at the problem constructively correctly. This is because no matter how smart you consider yourself, but your intellectual abilities in this obsessive and nervous state are significantly reduced. By the way, a person may not consciously perceive it and think within himself that he is acting and thinking correctly. Plus to all this - a huge psychoemotional fatigue.
You, I think, have noticed for yourself that in different states, looking at the same problem, we relate to it differently. If something bothers you, you are exhausted and instinctively let go of the problem, you could do it, then having returned to it, for example the next day, it does not seem to you such a problem. And the solution, as a rule, is quite fast, and without much stress and deliberation.
If the obsessive state lasts long enough, a person becomes very sensitive to any, even minor stresses and desperately, nervously reacts to the most trifling troubles and problems. The real one.
How to relieve stress
And now about how to relieve nervous tension and get rid of obsessive thoughts before it comes to neurosis. 
So, how can we get out of this very unpleasant and harmful state for us. To begin with, the most important thing is to understand for yourself that it is hardly possible to solve the problem because of which you have brought yourself to such a state.
Plus to that, even finding suitable answer, thoughts about the problem itself won't let you calm down, and the decision itself will still be questionable. Therefore first of all need to release voltage. Already understanding of this will give you the opportunity to more easily perceive the current situation.
Now you need to focus on something else. The best thing to do in this case is to do your favorite thing, exactly what causes you positive emotions. At the same time, negativity and obsessive thoughts will continue to stick in your head.
And here the most important moment - don't resist obsessive thoughts if they do not go away and let them beat the same time, not analyzing calmly ignoring them.
Any disturbing, obsessive thoughts, if you try not to think about them, will prevail even more and more. Trying to argue or get rid of them, you provoke a struggle and thereby only increase internal tension.
You can watch your thoughts, but without trying to certainly and sooner get rid of it, let it all go naturally. Without conflict with them, these thoughts themselves will gradually dissolve.
As a result, without thinking over, not struggling with yourself and not looking for a solution to the problem, slowly everything bad will lose its strength, and the positive emotions that you will gradually begin to experience from doing what you like, gain strength. It will take time and, depending on the strength and duration of the obsessive state, less or more. But this is a great way to get out of this state.
If you can, you can take a contrast shower, alright takes off nervous tension and unpleasant symptoms of stress, like what you read in the article "". Or go to the pool, physically active, swimming and the water itself is what you need.
Still very good help such activities, even if they are not quite to your taste, such as drawing, knitting, wood carving, etc. It is important that this does not require a lot of mental process from you. You draw, then you draw calmly, easily and not too zealously, so that everything will turn out well. How it turns out and let it be.
Like at school in the classroom, with diligence and passion, but without extra temperamental emotions and without twisting, from diligence, tongue on its side. Although it is possible at school, some tried very, very hard. Now this is not necessary, another time. Engaged in wood carving or embroidery, the same thing.
These classes are methodical, calm the brain well and do not require excessive mental activity. If only you, not like the great Surikov and do not paint a picture for the Tretyakov Gallery.
Another effective way to get out of nervous tension and an obsessive state is similar to the previous one. Gently transfer attention to some another problem the decision of which is also important for you, but less worrisome and requires rather not emotional costs, but some actions.
You will need some willpower and that negative energy accumulated in the process of finding a solution to the first problem. And even somewhere anger. It is important to try to solve this problem with enthusiasm, with the search and study of the best solution to it.
Your thought process will again take away your energy, but the most important thing here is that you remove the severity of that first negative situation that led you to an obsessive state and thereby not concentrating on it, gradually free your mind from obsessive thoughts.
That is, if you use the energy of strong tension in solving another problem, take yourself out of an obsessive state, and this in itself, although costly in terms of energy, will calm the inflamed brain. And the very solution to this second problem will give you positive energy.
But then again, always remember that you do not, if obsessive thoughts do not recede, you do not fight with them. Thus, you learn to live when there are some such thoughts and when there are none, you simply do not run from them. Gradually, your perception of them will change from a hostile to a calmer one and you will cease to be afraid of their appearance and these thoughts themselves, the anxiety will go away and they will cease to put pressure on you.
Friends, if you feel that you are in such a state of mental tension and at the same time you couldn’t solve your problem, find an answer, will be 100% correct abandon its further decision.
Leave it for later, give your heated thinking an opportunity to relax, cool off. And better "sleep" with her. Morning evening is wiser, this is a very smart and useful expression. You can look at the problem that bothers you a little from the outside and with a rested, cold brain.
Sometimes it’s generally necessary move away from a problem, afford leave it unresolved so that you can clearly see its true essence, is it really important to you? It often happens that the problem was not so important at all, so that it would bother and worry so much. At the same time, this break and a fresh look will make it possible to discern new options and possibilities for solving it.
And in order to most effectively and easily deal with a nervous condition you can learn something interesting and useful for yourself, as well as learn to change some old beliefs that hinder you, learn about how to reassess values, find out how it works and understand how and what it is.
For this, there are excellent trainings and books, effective techniques and relaxation methods, you can familiarize yourself with some of them on my website. And in order not to miss updates on this topic, you can subscribe to the newsletter.
Nervous state and tension. Finally.
Listen to different words less. Some angry languages \u200b\u200bcan say something about you, which can be very unpleasant for you, insults or tell you any nasty things that are not necessarily true, for example, your husband or wife is cheating on you.
Without thinking, you rush headlong into your emotions without really knowing if it is true or not. Instead, first talk to her (him), and then draw conclusions!
There are enough envious people and dirty tricks in the world, so be independent of the words of insulting some and approach wiser to the gossip of others. First of all, think about your health, because life will continue anyway, and after the black strip there will certainly be a bright, blue strip.
A bike about an ostrich. I’ll tell my friends right away, do not connect this ostrich tale with what I wrote above, this is only for your mood. Although something worth paying attention to ..
Ostrich is not a stupid bird, when there is danger, he hides his head in the ground. What for? And why should he take into account all the problems. He thinks that whatever happens, that cannot be avoided, but I will not worry.
Just think, the ass will remain on the surface. Well, it’s better to accept all problems with your ass than your head, the head is still more important. And the ass ... well, what could happen to her? Yes, nothing wrong and can not.
Just that, he hides his head in the ground and rests, does not see anything, does not see what is happening with his ass. And if the problem is not visible, then there is no problem.
Well, and if this still arises in the form of a masochistic elephant, what can you do, the main head in the sand is relaxing, the ass has accepted the problem, she’s not used to it, she and the ass are looking for adventure, and there’s peace of mind, no tension and in general everything is super.
The main thing is that the relatives should not see the problem, otherwise explain later what’s happening - the head, ass, elephant ....
Regards, Andrei Russkikh
P.S. Read more about obsessive states and thoughts, their treatment, read here ()
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In this article I will begin to consider a topic that is extremely important for all of us - Relaxation. What affects our level of relaxation and tension? How do we create our tensions ourselves? Why is relaxation so important for each of us, even if it seems to you that it is “not serious” and you should always “hold yourself”?
Muscle relaxation and tension.
I suggest you straighten your back, and clench your right hand in a fist. Fine. You could do it right now because you tensed some of your muscles. The muscles that we consciously can voluntarily control are called skeletal muscles. And while we are alive, they are in a certain tone. This is the norm, it should be so.
Between a muscle in strong tension and absolutely relaxed there is a huge number of transitional states. But basically we are not used to noticing them, but in vain. For this inattention, we sometimes pay extremely dearly, for example, with a headache or even a migraine.
All our actions, affairs in the outside world are the work of our muscles. Can you do anything now that your muscles will not take part in? “I will think,” the thinking reader will say, “while my muscles are relaxed.” I hasten to upset you, this is not so. Our muscles affect our thoughts, and our thoughts affect our muscles.
"Woe from Wit." Or how we ourselves can strain ourselves to a headache.
The brain, the command center of our body, affects the level of tension, and therefore relaxation, of all our muscles. It is from the brain that the command paths to all muscles go. Attention! Thinking and the brain are interconnected. Scientists do not know exactly how they are connected, but what they are connected is what they know for sure. The sensations in our body cause us various thoughts. "ABOUT! This cake was so delicious. I’ll buy a little more. ” So any of our thoughts resonates in our body, and especially in the muscular system. For example, he remembered the troubles at work, and the muscles of his forehead tensed. Let slightly, just a little bit. And very often this happens unnoticed by oneself. That is, I started to strain a little, but not so much as to draw my attention to it. It would seem - a trifle. But then, when the tension in the same muscles of the surface of the head reaches a certain limit, we begin to feel like “my head starts to hurt”, and if we continue in the same spirit and not notice the tension, we will come to “Oh God! How does my head crack. ” Such tension also provokes migraine and attacks of osteochondrosis. And, it would seem, just a little forehead was strained.
In addition to the muscles of the forehead, we also, chronically, little consciously strain many other muscles. The tension of these muscles is impractical at the moment, simply put, right now this tension is unnecessary. And the muscle “works”, works at high speeds, idling. And at the same time she spends energy quite tangible. So chronic stress is the key to chronic fatigue. Pay attention now, for example, to your shoulders. Interesting for the sake of whether they are omitted, or tense and uplifted?
Habit is second nature.
We strain often out of habit, although at the moment there is no point in straining. Or because we actively represent our past or future, plan, predict, talk with someone who was not told everything they wanted in person, or did not have time. Or because there is no one to say, but I want to.
There is a way out. It is impossibly simple. And this is not a call - "relax, do not be pinched." The solution is to notice how I strain my muscles. Here and now, at the moment. In the bustle of life. In the stream of circumstances. Be attentive to yourself, to your body, in the truest sense of the word. Attention is a great gift to yourself.
I have prepared for you a small excerpt from a stunning documentary, with a great atmosphere of relaxation.
Hello, I have an unusual, it seems to me, problem - I can’t relax. I tried various teachings and techniques, such as yoga, running, swimming, taking baths, thinking about the beautiful), etc. The only thing that more or less relaxed the body was a quality long-term massage. This problem, in my opinion, is associated with a 100 percent focus on results - if I swim, then I have one goal - to sail as quickly as possible, etc.
Please help, I believe that the advice of a psychologist is needed here.
Psychologists Answers
Good morning, Sergey! You cannot relax at the level of feelings, hence the tension and clamps in the body. This is due to the struggle with feelings about which you do not know, probably the fear of letting go of control. Those. Controlling the situation is your security. The reasons are certainly in the "not digested" experiences in the past or the current situation in the present.
Ask yourself the question- What will happen the worst if you do not control?
If this does not help, then you need to consult a therapist.
Good luck and all the best!
Dzhamalova Tevriyat Sultanovna, psychologist, Moscow
Good answer5 Bad answer0Hello, hello! In fact, you are right - the inability to relax is a psychological difficulty, and it occurs quite often in a psychologist’s consultation, especially recently.
And you are right that this difficulty is connected with focus on results. This is a way of adapting to life, which develops in childhood, when a child gets used to receiving the love and attention of others for the fact that he does something all the time, achieves, and not because he simply is. The child is not taught to celebrate their victories, enjoy joy. The child has only results and obligations. As soon as the child gets the result, he is given a new task, and so on, and more, and without end.
Advice, of course, is indispensable here, since it is connected with the perception of oneself, this is a personality trait. And as you know, what has been formed and maintained for a long time takes time to change this.
Bogacheva Antonina Vladimirovna, psychologist-consultant Moscow
Good answer4 Bad answer2 
Hello, Sergey. I’ll try to give the most specific advice, since discussions about the causes of what is happening to you can be conducted endlessly. Set yourself a new task that you will carry out with your own purposefulness - during each day, look for moments / situations in which you simply enjoy the process. But not in large-scale affairs, but in the most ordinary little things (best if they are associated with bodily sensations) - try to enjoy a cup of tea or coffee, a shower, walking, waking up or falling asleep. All that accompanies you every day. Do not ignore these grains that make up most of your life, but turn them into art. At first glance, this may not seem serious. But before going to bed, try to remember the most pleasant moments and restore them in your feelings, enjoy them again. I am sure that if you live like this for several days, then the tension will begin to subside. Of course, this is not a panacea and, most likely, sources of tension lie in your attitude to life. But this will be the first step towards your more relaxed and harmonious life. Good luck to you. Sincerely, Daria Razmakhnina
Razmakhnina Daria Yuryevna, psychologist Moscow
Good answer3 Bad answer0Good afternoon. Taking the step how to learn to relax, you will learn the most effective relaxation techniques. This step, as well as each of the steps within the framework, will be divided into theory and practice.
After you become familiar with the theory, you will be able to practice and for seven days, every day to master various ways of relaxation. You go through the practice yourself, just reading my course and following the recommendations from it.
If you have completed the implementation of the practical recommendations given in the previous steps, then I hope you got an idea about the development of willpower and awareness. These skills will help you a lot during this step. And if you started studying my plan for self-development with this step, then it’s okay, finish it, and then proceed to the previous ones if you wish.
As a theoretical basis that underlies this step, I will give the main conclusions from all articles on relaxation, which are presented on my blog. So you can take this step as an independent article summarizing everything else, and it will briefly outline all the information that will help you learn how to relax.
The ability to relax independently is an important skill
In our busy life, the ability to relax on our own is a strategically important skill. But, unfortunately, not everyone has this skill and therefore resort to the help of alcohol and all sorts of sedatives and without this they can not relieve stress. These people are convinced that the stressful environment surrounding them is the fault of their stress, and that, under such circumstances, it is impossible to relax without auxiliary means. But this is not so. The amount of stress received per day depends not only on the external environment, but also on your sensitivity to stress, the ability to maintain a relaxed internal state among the external fuss. Therefore, it is important not only to be able to relax while relaxing, but also to be calm throughout the day, letting in as little stress and negativity as possible. And the less stress we get, the easier it will be for us to relax later.
Many people forget about this and, having tried several relaxation techniques, they do not succeed, since the tension is too great. Therefore, here we will learn not only relaxation techniques, but also how to maintain a relaxed state throughout the day.
If you get used to relaxing with alcohol, the body gradually loses its ability to withstand stress. This happens, firstly, due to the fact that alcohol destroys the nervous system, and secondly, because, getting used to doping, to an easy and quick means of relief, you lose the ability to bring yourself to a calm state on your own and when you Do not drink, your level of anxiety rises.
It is important to be able to suppress nervousness in yourself and quench the accumulated tension. A tense and nervous person is like a car moving at high speed, which is very difficult to drive: one careless effort directed at the steering wheel - and the car starts to move from side to side, losing balance. When you are nervous, it’s difficult for you to manage yourself and everything goes completely different from what you yourself want: you lose your mind, make unnecessary movements, speak very quickly, stammer. In general, you in every possible way "brings" cornering.
A relaxed person rides at a reasonable speed, which allows him to deftly maneuver, avoiding obstacles without missing a single traffic light or warning. When you are relaxed, everything is better for you, as you want. In addition, a relaxed body, like a slow car, consumes much less energy than an organism that is in constant tension. And if you are relaxed all day, then the rest of your strength and good mood is preserved in your evening.
"Going quietly - you will continue," says popular wisdom. The less stressed you are and the more relaxed you are, the less you get sick and, accordingly, live longer, as many diseases are associated with the state of the nervous system.
How to achieve such relaxation? The following articles will help you with this. You can familiarize yourself with them or read the conclusions from them, which I will give below. The conclusions will concern only the theory, we will deal with the practice in the next part of this step. If you can’t wait to learn about the basic relaxation techniques, go straight to the practice, it is presented below in the article, especially since I outlined the main theoretical conclusions in this step.
Theory
Optional
In the event that the reason you can’t relax is constant nervous rush, impulsiveness, constantly distracted attention, difficulties in sitting in one place for a long time, then I recommend reading this article.
If you are nervous a lot, then I advise you to read this article, since nervousness creates tension.
Conclusions from the theory
- Stress is your inner reaction to what is happening. And how strong this reaction is is up to you.
- Nervousness, inability to relax only interfere in life.
- Stress and fatigue are easier to prevent than to prevent!
- The fact that you cannot relax without alcohol and other drugs is a lie.
- Alcohol is one of the most harmful and dangerous drugs. It has a devastating effect on the body. This is far from the most suitable means of relaxation.
Practice. Mastering relaxation techniques.
Practice, as usual, will be broken down by day and should be carried out gradually. Every few days we will learn one of the relaxation techniques. In addition, daily tips will be given to help you relax as you go. The purpose of the practice is to try various relaxation techniques by ourselves and make sure that our body can relax on its own, you just need to properly configure yourself. The program is designed to help you gradually learn to relax, its schedule will help you control yourself, following the plan I set. This is much more effective than doing haphazardly.
But if you do not want to follow the plan, then from here you can gather a lot of useful information about relaxation methods. But still, I recommend to conduct an experiment on yourself and engage in the schedule, it will also help you live an unusual week for you and make a difference in your life.
During the practice of this step (7 days), completely eliminate the use of alcohol. If you smoke, then reduce the number of cigarettes smoked daily at least 1.5 times, or better, generally 2.
Day 1-3. Mastering diaphragmatic breathing
Let's start with a very effective relaxation technique. This breathing occurs by raising and lowering the diaphragm, the internal organ that divides the upper body and lower. Unlike chest breathing, when you breathe in the diaphragm, your stomach lowers and rises, not your chest. This breathing allows you to effectively oxygenate your tissues, it provokes a faster release of toxins and helps to relax.
When you are tense, you breathe at a fast pace, but to relax you need to take deep and slow rhythmic breaths and exhalations (perhaps this is the reason why the smoker relaxes, breathing in and out smoke is all about breathing.).
How to learn diaphragmatic breathing? Very simple. Sit or assume a supine position. The back is straight, look in front of you. Put one hand on the chest, the other on the stomach. Breathe. If you use the diaphragm breathing, then the chest should rest in place, and the stomach should lower and rise. At the same time, one does not need to bulge and squeeze the abdomen by means of muscle effort: the tension of the abdominal cavity should be due to air, expands the lungs, lowering the diaphragm. The abdominal muscles should be relaxed.
Take as deep a breath in and out as possible, the duration of which should be equal to each other. You can look at the stopwatch or measure these time intervals by heartbeats. Holding the breath between inhalation and exhalation is not necessary. Do not be distracted by extraneous thoughts: relaxation is also due to the fact that you fix all your attention on the breath.
At first, diaphragmatic breathing may not work, but everything comes with practice. Do this exercise 3-5 minutes. 2-3 times a day, but not immediately after a meal. After completing the exercise, pay attention to your well-being, you feel calmer, don't you? You can breathe like this before an important meeting, in traffic, at work (or after), when you need to put your head and nerves in order and relax.
A more complex version of the exercise is breathing with a compressed glottis. You need to tighten your throat in a special way so that the air enters and leaves you through a narrow gap, then when you inhale and exhale, the sound "xxxxxx" appears. Thus, the difference in pressure between the air outside and the air inside increases, and the oxygen with which the stomach is filled begins to put more pressure on its walls. Thus, a more effective massage of the internal organs and tissue oxygenation occur. Such breathing is used in yoga. You can try it after mastering the initial breathing skills of the diaphragm.
Additional exercises
From this day, every day try to take breaks in work (3-4 times a day for 10 minutes). During the break, walk around and move around if you have sedentary work (in general, engage in a lesson that is completely different from your work). If possible, it is better to go outside and breathe. Think of something else. During a break, you cannot look at the monitor. Accustom yourself to breaks in work, try to do it always, in the future, and not just for the duration of the practice from this step.
Accustom yourself to never rush, even if you are late. Enter this as your rule. Haste is very bad for your nervous state and is very tiring. When you are in a hurry, you actually achieve the result not much faster than if you act measuredly. You can even lose due to the loss of concentration and concentration as a result of the fact that you are in a hurry.
On one of these three days, take a long walk alone. During it, try to clear your mind of thoughts about the current day, think about something abstract. Look more around, pay attention to what is happening around and do not lock yourself in thoughts of yourself and your experiences. As soon as you find that your mind begins to fumble in pondering today's problems, calmly stop it. Discipline your thinking, it will help you a lot in life.
And I hope you have not forgotten about meditation? If you have not read the previous steps, then study along with this step and add meditation to your daily practice.
Day 4. Yoga relaxation technique
On the fourth day, after reading these materials, try another relaxation technique, while continuing to exercise in diaphragmatic breathing 2-3 times a day.
In the evening, lie down on the bed (or on the rug, “foam”, on the floor), on your back. Turn your hands with your palms up, slightly spread them apart, so that the angle between the hand and the body would be thirty degrees. Close your eyes, no extraneous sounds should distract you. If you want to relax to music, then it should be very smooth music for relaxation (ambient, calm ethnic music). Start slowly stopping attention alternately on each part of the body from the top of the head to the toes and relaxing it: the top of the head, eyebrows, mouth, throat, shoulder, left arm: humerus, elbow, forearm, wrist, palm, fingers (you can stop individually ) again the palm, forearm, elbow, humerus, shoulders, right hand: the humerus ... And so on, we reach the toes. Then we try to relax the whole body.
Observe your thoughts as an outside observer; they should not bother you. If attention “floats”, gently bring it back. No need to try to stop thoughts and feelings at all costs, your goal is to relax. Just like in meditation. The more you force yourself to relax and not think about anything, the worse it will turn out. Your will must rest; it is not necessary to direct it to relaxation. In this state, you have no will, no desires, no intentions ... You just calmly observe.
Spend five to twenty minutes in this position, as much as you need. Get out of it smoothly: while continuing to lie down and not opening your eyes, move your toes, then with your fingers. Slowly roll onto your side and, helping yourself with your hands, sit down (this is so as not to make sharp muscular efforts). Open your eyes. Evaluate your condition, compare it with what it was before practice. Now you feel much more relaxed.
This exercise is also used in yoga to achieve complete relaxation after physical activity. Its principle is that relaxing the body entails peace of mind.
Now you know how to do it and from now on use this practice every time you need to relax. You can sometimes replace them with meditation.
Day 5. Take a light run
Take a short run that evening. Which everyone can do. You should be a little tired. Assess your condition after physical activity. You should feel pleasant tiredness in the body. At the same time, nervous fatigue should disappear, and your mood and overall well-being should be better than before. I do not just advise evaluating my condition every time. It is essential that the connection between meditation, sports, relaxation techniques and well-being is established in your brain.
When you want to drink alcohol or smoke, you are attracted not to the bottle and cigarette, as such, but to those conditions (relaxation, satisfaction, calm, good mood) that you achieve with these things. Having a formed connection in your head between a feeling of pleasure (or lack of displeasure) and certain drugs is one of the factors of dependence. The goal of this step is to make sure that pleasure and relaxation are associated with something useful, and not with destructive drugs for the body. Awareness of the effect of relaxation techniques, assessment of one’s condition, help to better fix the necessary connections in your brain.
So it will be easier for you to do this all, you will want to do it, because there will be a desire to feel better.
Day 6. Relax to the music
In the evening or afternoon, listen to an album or collection of some relaxing music. In this case, you should not do anything, but just listen. For many, quietly listening to music is a rather difficult task, since they are used to listening to music “in the background” (while driving in a car, doing work). And in the absence of other external stimuli, this process will seem to them very boring, they will want to interrupt it or do something in parallel. You must ignore this desire. We listen 40 minutes - an hour, before that we do not get up. We are relaxing. But remember that we should not force ourselves to enter into relaxation and worry about the fact that we do not succeed. Everything happens by itself.
Day 7. Final exercises
On the last day of practice, take an hour's walk or jog that you can do. Conduct a mental summary of the last lived week. Ask yourself, what did you learn new? What have you learned? Have you ever managed to somehow relax yourself. Significant progress should not be expected in just a week, but, in any case, you should feel the acquisition of at least some relaxation skills and feel the effect of the techniques described in this step.
Summary
The objective of this step was not simply to enumerate various relaxation techniques. You should have tried to make them yourself, in order to make sure that independent relaxation is possible without auxiliary drugs. And most importantly, that this awareness is entrenched within the patterns of your thinking. The goal of this step is to teach with a living example, and not just provide information about what relaxation techniques are.
I hope you understood from your own experience that there are a lot of effective, healthy ways of relaxation. And I hope even more that you will continue to embody this new knowledge in your life and not stop with the completion of the practice. Good luck to you! Wait for the release of new steps.
