It’s hard for me. Heaviness and pain in the soul, what to do
The most accurate indicator that you are carrying the burden of the past is the emotions that you experience day after day. Do you go to bed happy, in spite of all kinds of worries and troubles, or do you feel depression, anger, resistance and endless fatigue? If it’s easy on your heart, then you travel without excess baggage. Chronic heaviness in the soul indicates that you must get rid of the unnecessary. The beauty is that you, and only you, decide how you should continue your movement. The quickest way to free yourself is to simply let go. Say out loud: “I'm letting it go.” Here are a few signs that the time has come to get rid of the excess load — you want life to be predictable, and you really suffer when it is not. ..
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Any changes in plans, disappointments, unexpected disappointments, unpleasant surprises, traffic jams, interference from someone else’s side, the mood of those around you, you perceive as a personal insult.
♦ Insist that everyone do what you want, and be offended if this does not happen.
♦ Do not stop working, even feeling tired, hungry or stressed, while blaming others for their problems.
♦ You whine, complain, cling, criticize, gossip, pout, grumble, play "silence", pinched.
♦ Do not talk about your desires, making others guess about them.
♦ With bitterness, remember the past, be wary of the present and those around you, fearing that you will suffer again.
♦ Extremely quickly adapt, “bend”, while resisting internally
♦ Completely refuse to adapt to circumstances.
♦ Behave as if everyone else has no meaning.
♦ Constantly “hold the defenses”.
Of course, from time to time we all behave in a similar way. There are moments and even days when we feel insecure, something is missing, we are looking for salvation in old habits and memories. But if this happens daily, then the excess cargo has become poisonous.
You are tired, exhausted, alarmed, you carry on your shoulders an excess load, from which you need to be freed as soon as possible. Realizing this is already half the battle.
All you have to do is drop it, like throwing a heavy suitcase to the ground, full of unnecessary things. And that’s all. You can put a small but significant pebble in your pocket, and whenever you want to feel relief, put your hand in your pocket and remove the pebble. Throw it to the ground - as you would to get rid of the problem, anxiety, gravity, stress, the need to control, fear, indignation - all that pulls you down. You yourself choose what to carry with you through life, and do not have to shoulder the extra burden. There is nothing noble or spiritual in dragging unnecessary weight on your shoulders. It only bothers you and your loved ones.
Cleansing
To get rid of excess baggage is one of the components of mental work that everyone should carry out without exception. We can do this in several ways. Take a course of therapy, methodically walk through all your "suitcases" together with a qualified specialist, choose what you need to take on a future trip, and abandon the rest. I have done this several times in my life and highly recommend it to you.
Feel relieved
In Kauai, one of the Hawaiian islands, I visited a Hindu monastery, where monks give out pens and sheets of paper to visitors, offering to describe everything that weighs and interferes in life, and then burn their notes. The monks believe that this practice frees the subconscious from negative patterns and problems, and doing it daily, you throw off all that is superfluous.
Many of my spiritual teachers advised me to use this method to feel inner relief, and I have successfully repeated this technique many times. And after that, I felt how in the cleansing flame magically dissolved what had burdened me before.
Exhale
Since the life force, the Divine spirit, comes to a person with breathing, it means that you can also get rid of the old psychological baggage with the help of breathing. Go to the nearest store or supermarket, to the department where holiday decorations are sold, buy a few balloons. Go outside, try to feel how much energy your psychological baggage absorbs. In order not to carry too much on yourself, take one balloon and visualize the load that you would like to free yourself from. Inflate a balloon, imagining how you breathe out all your problems and sorrows into this balloon with air. Release the ball into the air. Keep the remaining balls on hand to repeat the exercise as needed.
Pray
Prayer helps to get rid of excess baggage. When a person prays, he breaks the connection with the burden of the past and turns to God. Prayer opens the channel for the entrance of Divine power, neutralizes and transforms the psychological burden into something new, fresh and bright. My favorite prayer is when you need to throw off the emotional burden: “Letting go, with God.” To use this prayer in a stressful situation, say out loud: "I let it go - further on all the will of God." Then spread your arms to the sides and spread your fingers as wide as possible, releasing the unnecessary. Shake your fingers as if shaking them off what is stopping you. The effect is quick if the prayer is sincere.
Sonya Chocket - Traveling at the Speed \u200b\u200bof Love
"Without sorrow there is no salvation, but the kingdom of heaven awaits those who suffer."
Rev. Seraphim of Sarov
Depression, loneliness, detachment from the world ...
How terrible these words are when the soul hurts. Of course, I would like to wish everyone to always have a bright heart, so that joy always lives in it. But there is no earthly life without pain. Many of us have had or will have moments when we feel bad, we feel like crying; when you don’t want to see anyone, you don’t want to talk to anyone; when there is no desire to eat and move. It seems that he would have been lying to himself for years and waiting for the soul to beat off, and the heart will want to rejoice again. But, as a rule, in life all problems fall upon a person and turn into a big snowball. Possible causes of depression: loss of a loved one, trouble at work, lack of diversity, loneliness, premonition of something unkind, sad memories, loss of meaning in life, unrequited love, failure, self-doubt, dissatisfaction with oneself, quarrels, misunderstanding of relatives, complexes, rumors , falsehood, "black stripe", betrayal.
What to do when you feel bad and want to cry?
What to do when you feel bad and want to cry? Maybe cry? Yes, this is a great option. It’s a pity that it’s short-lived, and after it the head breaks.
Here are a few more ways that may possibly help when you feel bad and want to cry:
- Start fixing bugs (if at all it is about them, if there is something to fix).
- Arrange a noisy fun holiday.
- Workout.
- Allow yourself to sleep as much as you want.
- Review food. Start eating more dark chocolate, cheese, coffee, bananas, oranges.
- Relax in the bathhouse, massage, spa, etc.
- Take a trip.
- To do meditation.
- Seek help from a doctor, psychologist.
- Get away with a difficult job.
- More walk and relax in nature.
- Start a repair.
- Go shopping.
- Do charity work.
Personally, as an Orthodox person, I advise you to confess and partake. Priests call depression the cry of the soul about its dysfunction. Do not fall into sin called "despondency."
What to do when you feel bad and want to cry, everyone can decide for themselves. The main thing is to do something. Of course, time heals any wounds. But it is precisely the moment when mental pain spills over the edge, you also need to be able to experience correctly.
What you do not need to do when you feel bad and want to cry:
- To tirelessly analyze your condition, constantly scroll through traumatic events in your head.
- Ask yourself questions: “What am I doing this for?”, “Why did this happen to me?” If you really can’t do it without questions, then better think: “Why (for what purpose) were the trials sent?”
- Blame yourself or someone else.
- Develop a self-destruction plan.
Depression is dangerous in all its manifestations. Remember this. I recommend Sinelnikov’s book “Love your disease”.
Yes, it is difficult (or even impossible) to give recommendations on the topic "What to do when you feel bad and want to cry" in one article. I just want to ask with gratitude to accept all the tests. They make us stronger. Or I really want to believe that.
And what do you do when you feel bad and want to cry?
PHOTO Getty images
1. Morning is wiser than the evening: sleep again. Sleep heals, calms and prompts.
2. To do something (write, wash, disassemble, connect, that is, to achieve some simple integrity and completeness in the small).
3. Go for a walk and see that the world is wide and full of colors, and our focus on the negative is a small part of it.
4. Ask yourself an adequate and great physical activity.
5. Recall, step by step, what led to heaviness in the soul and to find in it as much as possible accurate, serious, but also funny.
6. Introduce yourself in the form of comics, running pictures. How do you get out of the situation, what characters do you meet and into whom you yourself turn.
7. Imagine three other people in your place who are of interest to you.
8. To come up with a game “looking for a way out” by setting search parameters for others - moving away from gravity by the distance of an outstretched arm. Now you are near, but not inside the problem, look at it like a board and yourself, like a figure, move on it.
9. Recall and make from many details a situation in which you would be well: to model bliss, if not to feel it completely.
10. Find an unexpected point on the body. Imagine what you draw with it in the air, describing circles. A very useful exercise, which allows you to break the general centering and the fact that the body is kept compressed.
11. Write yourself a letter from the place and time when it was good.
12. It’s important not to mutter to yourself when it’s bad, but to give free rein to fine motor skills: draw with a pencil, sculpt from plasticine, fold from paper, weave from beads, crochet ... If you don’t have any of this, it’s good to go and buy what to pamper yourself.
13. Go to some shop or camber and rub things with your hands.
14. Talk to two people: let one of them, like acid, corrodes and removes all that is superfluous, and the other - gives practical advice from the standpoint of "everything is decided." But do not blabber for yourself.
15. Try to close your eyes and arouse imagination, a waking dream, about how you swim underwater and breathe, you have a flamethrower in your hand, and you find some treasures, obstacles, fight and fall into a different space and dimension somewhere. Move your fingers and toes. It turns out such an interactive computer game with the whole body.
16. Write some text without taking as a basis a previously thought up thought. Let the text itself lead you somewhere, and you - follow it.
17. Be grateful for what has led you to a seemingly dead end. What lessons can you learn to live on successfully and in a good mood?
18. Decide what nice little gifts you can give to others. Causing their smile and joy, you will return yours.
PHOTO Getty images
1. Morning is wiser than the evening: sleep again. Sleep heals, calms and prompts.
2. To do something (write, wash, disassemble, connect, that is, to achieve some simple integrity and completeness in the small).
3. Go for a walk and see that the world is wide and full of colors, and our focus on the negative is a small part of it.
4. Ask yourself an adequate and great physical activity.
5. Recall, step by step, what led to heaviness in the soul and to find in it as much as possible accurate, serious, but also funny.
6. Introduce yourself in the form of comics, running pictures. How do you get out of the situation, what characters do you meet and into whom you yourself turn.
7. Imagine three other people in your place who are of interest to you.
8. To come up with a game “looking for a way out” by setting search parameters for others - moving away from gravity by the distance of an outstretched arm. Now you are near, but not inside the problem, look at it like a board and yourself, like a figure, move on it.
9. Recall and make from many details a situation in which you would be well: to model bliss, if not to feel it completely.
10. Find an unexpected point on the body. Imagine what you draw with it in the air, describing circles. A very useful exercise, which allows you to break the general centering and the fact that the body is kept compressed.
11. Write yourself a letter from the place and time when it was good.
12. It’s important not to mutter to yourself when it’s bad, but to give free rein to fine motor skills: draw with a pencil, sculpt from plasticine, fold from paper, weave from beads, crochet ... If you don’t have any of this, it’s good to go and buy what to pamper yourself.
13. Go to some shop or camber and rub things with your hands.
14. Talk to two people: let one of them, like acid, corrodes and removes all that is superfluous, and the other - gives practical advice from the standpoint of "everything is decided." But do not blabber for yourself.
15. Try to close your eyes and arouse imagination, a waking dream, about how you swim underwater and breathe, you have a flamethrower in your hand, and you find some treasures, obstacles, fight and fall into a different space and dimension somewhere. Move your fingers and toes. It turns out such an interactive computer game with the whole body.
16. Write some text without taking as a basis a previously thought up thought. Let the text itself lead you somewhere, and you - follow it.
17. Be grateful for what has led you to a seemingly dead end. What lessons can you learn to live on successfully and in a good mood?
18. Decide what nice little gifts you can give to others. Causing their smile and joy, you will return yours.
Which of us has never been unbearably hard on our hearts? Who did not experience a terrible depression in which life itself was not sweet? Who did not dream to fall asleep, wake up and understand with joy that all the troubles and tribulations experienced are just a nightmare?
If a person has true friends, they will certainly come to him in a difficult moment to encourage him. But their words are far from always able to heal heart pain. They tell us what they themselves or someone else had to endure, hoping that we would calm down and say: “my troubles are not as great as those of others” ... But we listen to the consolations of friends scattered or detached - not because our trouble is more painful someone else’s misfortune, and therefore their words, like a key to someone else’s castle, do not open their hearts to encouragement, and the pain remains in it. We feel that they do not understand us, although they are trying to help. The wedge of one’s own sorrow is not kicked out by a wedge of another.
But the most painful thing is the consciousness that God does not hear us, and therefore there is no chance to get out of trouble. We even dare to God: “And why did you bring me out of the womb? I wish I died before I had seen anyone; May I, as a non-being, be transferred from the womb into the grave! ”(Job 10: 18,19).
What to do in such situations? Is there real, not far-fetched, help for those who are broken in spirit? Practical advice can be given by someone who himself has been in a similar situation. One of these people is a psalmist from the sons of Korea. His behavior in a mournful situation, his appeal to his own heart give a good example to follow. All this is recorded in 41 psalms, which the interpreters of the Bible classify as weeping psalms.
1 To the chief of the choir. Doctrine. Sons of the Koreans. 2 As a doe desires for streams of water, so my soul desires for you, God! 3 My soul thirsts for a mighty, living God: when I come and appear before God! 4 My tears were bread for me day and night, when they told me every day: “where is your God?” 5 Remembering this, I pour out my soul, because I walked in crowded places, entered with them into the house of God with a voice of joy and glory celebrating host. 6 What are you despondent, my soul, and that you are embarrassed? Trust in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God. 7 My soul is discouraged in me; therefore, I remember You from the land of Jordan, from Hermon, from Mount Zohar. 8 Abyss calls the abyss with the voice of Your waterfalls; all your waters and your waves have passed over me. 9 By day the Lord will show His mercy, and at night I will have a song with Him, a prayer to the God of my life. 10 I will tell God my intercessor: why have you forgotten me? Why am I complaining about insulting the enemy? 11 As if striking my bones, my enemies swear at me when they say to me every day: “where is your God?” 12 What are you discouraged, my soul, and that you are embarrassed? Trust in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God.
At first glance it seems that this psalm comes from a heart torn by inconsolable sorrow. But in reality he is realistic and full of hope. He calls man to trust in God, despite the ordeals. To trust means to rely on God's promises of help and comfort, it means to hide in Him like a strong tower. The psalmist talks with his own soul and urges her to reckon with God, and not with difficult circumstances. To convince oneself of the need to trust in God is the best way to keep the soul from despair. Despair is by no means a harmless state of mind. At its core, it is nothing but a blasphemy against God, the recognition of Him powerless to help the suffering.
God did not in vain leave in the Bible for saddened hearts 41 Psalms, from where they can extract for themselves six inspiring encouragements.
1. Trust in God, even if the thirst for fellowship with Him is not yet satisfied!
As a doe desires for streams of water, so my soul desires for You, God! My soul thirsts for a strong, living God: when I come and appear before God!
The author of the Psalm was far from the temple of the Lord in Jerusalem and could not come there for worship. Separation from the house of God burdened the psalmist so much that he compared himself to a doe, intensely seeking water. Water for fallow deer is a matter of life or death. She feels water from afar and when she finds it, she drinks for a long time and with pleasure. If there is no water, the doe languishes from excruciating thirst, strength fades in its fast and thin legs.
That water is for fallow deer, then God is for a believer. He is a source of joy and comfort, always necessary, and not just on great holidays. “If only He was always close, I would not want anything with Him! Happy with the love of Christ, I would have revered everything for rubbish, ”the Christian song says.
However, it happens that God moves away from man. And then the difficult days of severe drought in the soul come. She seeks God and cannot find Him. “But now, I am going forward - and He is not, back - and I cannot find Him; Does He do what is on the left side, I do not see; whether it hides on the right, I do not see it ”(Job 23: 8,9). How easy it is to fall into mortal gloom! How easy it is to say: “It's over! Good days will never come! ”But do not enter into this dangerous path of worldly sadness, dear soul! Worldly sorrow produces death, for its object is lost hope, people deceived by expectations, earthly losses. Do not be upset! God experiences the purity of your thirst: Do you long for Him or worldly goods. Sadness for God's sake leads to His attainment: “Put thy cares on the Lord, and He will support you. He will never let the righteous hesitate ”(Ps. 54:23). “... and those who know your name will trust in you, because you do not leave those who seek you, Lord” (Psalm 9:11).
2. Trust in God, even if people mock your faith!
My tears were bread for me day and night, when they told me every day: "where is your God?"
Just think about it! Days and nights lasted stubborn attacks of disbelief on the soul! And they were aimed at the most precious thing - a relationship with God! Enemies laughed: “Where is the long-awaited help from your God? Something He is in no hurry to protect you! Your prayers only shake the air, does He really need you ?! ”
The well-known minister of the gospel in China, Watchman Nee, in his book The Normal Life of a Christian, recalled: “In 1929, I returned from Shanghai to my hometown of Fooshov. Once, when I was walking along the street, leaning on a stick because of great weakness and my shattered health, I met one of my former university professors. He invited me to go to the tea room with him, and we sat down at a table. He examined me from head to toe and finally said: “Yes, you know ... During your years at the university, we greatly appreciated you, and we had great hopes for you. We hoped you would do great things. Will you say that you really achieved something? ”He asked me this question in an offensively sharp tone, keeping his piercing eyes on me. I must confess that at the first moment I was ready to sob. My career, my health - I lost everything, and my old professor, who taught me law, sat next to me and asked me: “Have you still achieved nothing, no success, no progress? You have not identified yourself in any industry? ”
The enemy enjoys the opportunity to mock the faith of the righteous. And how bitter that there is nothing to object to these ridicule! However, in this case, you must continue to trust in God!
3. Trust in God, even if your friends become enemies!
Remembering this, I pour out my soul, because I walked in crowded places, entered with them into the house of God with the voice of joy and the glorification of the celebrating host.
What good friends the psalmist had! They went with him to the House of God, so they were considered believers. The sacred commandments of love for God and neighbor were well known to them. However, when a descendant of Korea had trouble, friends turned into enemies. No one can easily endure cheating on friends. Sufferer for faith Yuri Grachev, the author of the book “In the Herodic Abyss”, recalled with sadness how one day after his arrest he was confronted with the wife of a church minister, a Sunday school teacher. Returning to the cell, he wept bitterly, unable to comprehend with the mind that the sister in the Lord was slandering him. The youth’s faith in people suffered a crushing blow!
There is nothing unreliable person! Joseph delighted the tsar’s butler, who was thrown into prison by mistake, with a favorable interpretation of his dream, and asked him one thing: “Remember me when you feel good!” Three days later, the fate of the butler was drastically changed for the better - he was returned to his former honorable work, - but he didn’t even remember Joseph.
The famous Pierre Beranger wrote expressively about the human variability and ingratitude that flourishes in our world magnificently:
Winter. Blizzard. And in large flakes,
In strong winds, snow falls.
At the entrance to the temple alone in rags
An old beggar woman is standing.
And waiting for alms
She’s all here with her stick.
And in the summer and in the winter barefoot ...
Give alms to her!
Should I tell you ... This old woman
How twenty years ago she lived.
She was a poet's dream.
And glory wove her a wreath.
When she sang on stage
Paris was delighted with her.
She had no rivals ...
Give alms to her!
It happened after the introduction
There is no drive from the crowd.
And youth with admiration
“Bravo” thundered after her.
What lush praises
Censed her circle of guests -
With happiness, everyone is friends with us,
In grief there are no friends ...
The holy will of providence ...
The artist became sick
Lost voice and vision
And wanders around the world alone.
Sometimes a beggar is not afraid
Come for alms to her.
She is ashamed to ask you ...
Give alms to her!
When friends turn into enemies, in no case should not despair! Keep on trusting in God!
4. Trust in God, even if you cannot joyfully praise Him!
What are you discouraged, my soul, and that you are embarrassed? Trust in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God.
The psalmist hopes that one day he will again praise the Lord, someday he will again go to the house of God, accompanied by pious friends. Once upon a time ... but not now. Now is the time to seek healing for your discouraging soul. Now is the time of suffering, and it must be experienced. It happens with us - not always the heart is ready to joyfully praise the Lord.
Brother Suchkov Nikolai Egorovich, Honorary Bishop of the Stavropol Territory, told me an instructive story. The breadwinner of the gospel fraternity during the years of atheist persecution, the radio preacher Yarl Nikolaevich Peisti, having lost his beloved wife Pirkko, with whom he lived for 40 years, was very grieving. One friend wrote to him: "You will not be freed from sorrow until you glorify God." This advice plunged Yarl Nikolayevich into even greater sadness: “Well, I will say“ thank God, ”and so what? The soul is crying! ” If the soul cries, praises will be false, not from the heart. Is that not so?
However, not everything is as hopeless as it might seem at first glance! If you cannot praise the Lord, you can still trust in Him! You can hope that He will wipe away the tears from your eyes and put into the heart a song of joy and salvation. Do not let the hard present overshadow your glorious future! Trust in God, although there is no strength yet to worthily praise Him!
5. Trust in God, even if many troubles have come upon you!
My soul is discouraged in me; therefore, I remember You from the land of Jordan, from Hermon, from Mount Zohar. Abyss calls the abyss with the voice of Your waterfalls; all your waters and your waves have passed over me.
The psalmist honestly admits that despondency smothers him. He was expelled to the very outskirts of the country to the mountains of the Hermon ridge. He did not know if he could ever return to the holy city. He was in waves of sorrows, which one after another fell upon him, covering him with his head. He was choking in these waterfalls, it was difficult for him to fight with them, and still he urged the soul to trust in God, who could pacify the fierce waves.
How often people reject God in much more favorable circumstances than the psalmist! They do not have the strength to trust in Him. But we are not immune from various troubles. If David, a husband after the heart of God, has gone through many trials, then why do we claim a cloudless life? If the father of Russian Baptism Pavlov suffered for the name of Christ in the Orenburg exile, where his eldest daughter drowned, and after a short time cholera took his wife and three children, why should we all be calm? The Bible says: “The righteous have many sorrows.” And if they comprehend us, then we are on the right track! The main thing is to trust in God!
6. Trust in God, even if your important questions remain unanswered!
During the day the Lord will manifest His mercy, and at night I will have a song with Him, a prayer to the God of my life. I will tell God my intercessor: why did you forget me? Why am I complaining about insulting the enemy? As if striking my bones, my enemies swear at me when they say to me every day: "where is your God?"
Son Korea believes that once the darkness of sorrow will be replaced by the dawn of joy. But how hard it is to wait for the dawn! He asks God questions that torment him, but for some reason the Lord does not answer. Suffering without answers from the Lord is very difficult, especially when the enemies are constantly angry, and the pain of reproach does not cease to torment either day or night, just as a broken arm continuously aches.
What to do in such circumstances? Murmur against God? Curse fate Blame people? No and no again! " Trust in God, for I will still praise Him, my Savior and my God. ”If the Lord does not answer our woeful questions, then He has serious and good reasons for this. Didn’t Christ go through these trials, crying out on the cross: “Why have you forsaken Me”?
Trusting in Heavenly Father's love will support you in your experiences. Once the Lord spoke to the discouraging Yarl Nikolayevich Pastei: “Jarl! Wasn't Pirkko given to you as a gift from above and, moreover, for a short time? Didn't she belong to me first? Can't I take what belongs to Me? ” This word from God brought peace and joy to the soul, and the preacher had no choice but to agree with God and then thank Him wholeheartedly for the wonderful gift that he had used for forty years. The sorrow receded, and Paisty truly, with all his heart, glorified the Lord.
The Prophet Isaiah assured the sufferers: “... darkness will not always be where it has now thickened” (Isa. 8:22). For those who trust in the Lord, the sun of truth will rise and, in the light of that indescribable joy, the grief experienced will not seem a significant grief. Trust in the Lord!
