How to decide what to do with your life. What should I do with my life
Emotional exhaustion is not such a rare problem. But the decline in strength and doubt (“Do I do everything right in life?”, “Where should I go next?”) Is just a good reason to reconsider my priorities. We will publish an article for you that will tell you in which direction to act in order to begin to enjoy life.
I remember when I was at university, I thought that I needed to choose a job, doing which I would be happy for the next 50 years of my life or even more. What a challenge it is!
But the reality is that you cannot know for sure what will bring you joy all your life. You may not even know what will make you happy in 5 years. But you understand what gives you pleasure at the moment. And if your current situation is depressing, you need to move on. Life consists in trying different things and realizing who you do not want or want to become in the future.
Some simple truths to remember
1. No one can plan their future.
Remember, you do not know what awaits you. Life is full of surprises and unexpected twists. But if you do what you like, it doesn’t matter if it’s a job or a hobby for you — it will make your journey through life much more fun.
2. You can put up with discomfort.
Sometimes in life, something does not suit us. For example, you may not have enough money for everything that you so want to try. If you really want something, you will have to undergo some inconvenience on the way to achieving the goal. For example, I want my own dog team to race in Alaska. To do this, I had to abandon my cozy clean home in the city and move to Alaska. We often encounter water shortages and power outages, and our hut is much smaller than the old house. But we do not concentrate on discomfort, because we live in a beautiful place and I am on the path to fulfilling my dreams.
3. Life is changeable, it is better to learn how to change with it.
Things happen. Once it seemed to me that I had everything I could dream of: a wonderful job, a magnificent house in the forest. But I was fired, I lost my house, I was 40 and it all happened in one week. Then it turned out that I was pregnant. That one more week stood out. I spent a couple of days depressed lying on the couch, but then my plan matured and I went to Alaska. Circumstances can and should be used for their own benefit. Every nuisance is an opportunity for something more.
4. Delaying action is not a good strategy.
We are not getting younger. Unfortunately, that is the truth. If you do not start to use time properly and fulfill your dreams, by the end of your life you risk being left with nothing. If you seriously dream of achieving something, it is better to take action. The first steps are the most difficult, but it is better to tear yourself away from the Internet and get to work. You will not advance a millimeter, just thinking what heights you could reach.
5. Questions will help to understand yourself.
Giving yourself some time is a good idea. You can ask yourself really important questions. And minor. Understand yourself. To meditate. Make a list of what you are interested in and what you could do if you had enough time and money. Dreaming globally is difficult, but important. Calm your mind with its eternal “buts” and dream up on this subject.
6. No need to rush into the pool with your head.
If you have a job or hobby in which you are interested, try to do it on a gratuitous basis in order to understand whether this is exactly what you want to do. Even the biggest and wildest dreams will not help you if you neglect real actions and experience. Sometimes it seems that we really want to do something, but, having tried it once, we realize that this may not be exactly what it seemed. It is very important to try before radically changing your life in favor of dubious prospects.
7. It is important to make savings.
If you need to move or take courses to fulfill your dream, it will be appropriate to start earning money. I worked for many years to make my editorial portfolio impressive enough for working at home. And now I have the opportunity to edit articles from my tiny hut, get paid for it and pay with them the necessary equipment and food for dogs. Would I like dogs and races to bring me income? Sure. But so far I am just creating and training my team, so this is not possible. I have no experience in dog sled racing, but I have a reputation as a writer. So I do one favorite job to pay for another.
8. “Yes!” To new opportunities.
The chance to change your life for the better may lie under your nose, but you may simply not notice it and, accordingly, miss it. Do not miss the opportunity. Sometimes they appear at the wrong time, but you cannot influence it. However, it is in your power to open the door - or the opportunity may go away and knock on someone else.
When you try to understand what to do with your life, remember the main thing: the lack of action is not an action in itself. Making decisions and trying is the most important thing, even if in some cases you will be unhappy with your decisions. At the end of your life, you will not regret taking risks and encountering setbacks. But you will definitely not be glad that you did not try at all. Turn off your laptop and start living.
Michelle kennedy hogan
P.S. And remember, just changing our consumption - together we change the world! © econet
No one succeeds in everything at once. Everyone has their own difficulties. Even a friend with a stunning career, obedient children and a wealthy husband has problems. Even a friend who recently got married and moved to the south, not everything is going smoothly.
Do not envy someone else's life, even if it seems happy. You should not relax, thinking that we have finally overcome all difficulties: most often in such cases obstacles arise on the way. Abrupt turns are an integral part of life, we cannot avoid them. If you catch yourself thinking “everyone is fine except me,” this impression is deceptive.
Deadlines are an illusion
No need to step-by-step plan professional activities before you start working. You do not need to know exactly what you want from life in order to find a suitable partner. Life is a process of research and discovery. Allow yourself to develop and become better by trying and learning new things. Sometimes new hobbies stay with us for a long time, sometimes not. It does not matter.
Life is a journey, not a plan.
Many of us take life too seriously, and this is our problem. If something happens not as we hoped, we fall into despair. We tell ourselves that we are no good, admit defeat and stop trying new things.
Everything comes with practice. Often we make plans that fail, and actions end in failure - and so what? This is not the end of the world, moreover, it is a necessary experience. Only this helps to develop a new effective plan. Life is a journey, not a plan.
The main thing is to enjoy the present
When we try to understand ourselves, we distract from life in the present moment. And when something good happens, new opportunities arise, we don’t notice it. Stop forcing yourself to “put things in order” in life. Allow yourself to enjoy life here and now. Allow yourself to just be, please yourself with pleasant things: a cup of coffee and a good book, an evening walk, dinner with a close friend.
Ask yourself: how do I get rid of the need to be perfect?
When we stop, relax and allow ourselves to enjoy what we have, we merge into the natural flow of life. This allows you to better understand what decisions to make.
Stop for a moment and look inside yourself. Are you upset that not everything is perfect in life? Understand the cause of the disorder and ask yourself: how to get rid of the need to be perfect? What can I do every day to get rid of the tension that I create? You see, it will work.
You feel as if you are sailing through an endless sea of \u200b\u200bboring, uninteresting, monotonous events and the shore is not visible. And you are not alone in this. In fact, you are part of the largest group of people on this planet. All of them also do not know what to do with their life.
The first thing to understand is perfectly normal. People do not come into this world with knowledge of what their mission is in society. Instead, they are born with a ton of opportunities to find their calling. The problem is that although the choice is huge, it’s difficult. Moreover, life is constantly changing, and the right choice is also changing. How to really find your direction in order to finally understand what you really want to achieve in life.
1. We are not given to know the future
We can only imagine the future, but we should not fall into the trap of our thoughts. You do not know what awaits you: your health, work, family and society - everything can change, and nothing can be planned. However, you can try to do something that brings you joy. It doesn’t matter whether it concerns your work or just your hobbies, catch these positive points. The great advantage of this approach is that you can discover hidden talents or other paths to your own happiness. As for the foggy future, problems must be solved as they become available. One way to deal with them is to try to consider any negative as an opportunity to transform it into a positive.
2. Accept discomfort to achieve happiness
The road of life is rarely smooth. You may encounter a lack of finance, and an emotional “earthquake” that turns your world upside down. Some blows of fate simply cannot be completely avoided. Whenever you experience such discomfort, you will learn a little more about yourself and your desires for the future. You know yourself and feel for a more rational and effective way. At the beginning of your career, for example, you can work long and grueling to get a better position and grow. You go through a period of discomfort to win in the long run.
3. Get rid of distractions and stop putting it off.
Never forget that time does not wait for anyone. You can set your desired goals, but you will not achieve them if you put off the inevitable. The lost time cannot be restored as a file from the recycle bin. Finding your ideal life path is full of difficulties and efforts. Focus on it and cultivate yourself. Stop justifying your habit of being distracted and putting off many activities, as well as wasting your time.
4. Ask questions (both large and small)
You cannot get information without asking questions, including to yourself. Big questions are questions about your hobbies, priorities, finances and time. Small questions help you clarify the direction. Do you like working in the office? Do you prefer to live in a city or village? Do you like social activity? The more you study these and other issues, the better you understand who you are and your ideal vocation in life (or at least at the current stage of life).
5. Be prepared for casualties in the short term
Now you are probably feeling somewhat lost; you don’t know what to do with your life, and you want to understand where you are at all. However, between where you are now and where you want to be, lies the hard way. Discomfort is what has already been mentioned, but you are likely to face certain victims as well. It is possible that you will have to give up some things that you so far take for granted. For example, you want to start a business, and therefore be prepared for additional working hours, savings and even the rejection of any current benefits.
6. Open the doors to knocking opportunities
You need to be prepared to answer the knock on the door. Remember that trying something is one of the most effective ways to find out how it suits you. Therefore, when life seeks to show you the path, do not ignore it - just look where it will lead you. You may worry that this is not the right time or opportunity, but you will never know if you do not try. Sitting in anticipation is also a choice, but this choice is mostly regretted later.
Sometimes we find ourselves at a standstill. Or at the crossroads. Your destiny depends on where you go.
You cannot know what will make you happy, even after five years. But you know what makes you happy now. Therefore, you don’t know where to go next, but we’ll tell you: follow your dream no matter how far it is. Here are a few reasons:
1.You cannot look into the future
Life is full of interesting twists, but if we constantly pursue things that we like to do, whether it's work or a hobby, this will make the trip more interesting and fun. Maybe now you like to make shelves for the house. Maybe you can sell them. In five years, you can become a successful designer, designer or furniture manufacturer. Do you have experience creating designer furniture that can help you with other projects in the future.
2. Take calm discomfort
Sometimes life does not work out the way you would like. Sometimes you don’t have enough money to do everything that you planned. If you have what you really want to do, then you should be prepared to live in uncomfortable conditions. You may have to give up many habits or change your place of residence, but it's worth it to fulfill your dream.
3 overcome the distractions
Stop putting off. You are not getting younger. Sorry, but it's true. If you do not find time to fulfill your dreams, then you will be at the end of your life with nothing. Take these first steps. Log out of your Facebook or VKontakte and get started. You won’t achieve anything just by thinking how cool you could be.
4.Open the door
The opportunity may be knocking, but if you do not open the door, then how can you take this opportunity? You must take advantage of opportunities when presented to you. Sometimes at the wrong time, but it doesn’t matter. Opportunities arise by chance. Open the door or the opportunity may go and knock on someone else's door.
The most important thing when fulfilling your dream is action. You have to make decisions and try - even if at first something fails. At the end of your life, you will not regret what you did. You will regret that you did not have the courage and willpower to do what seems necessary to you now.
Question to the psychologist
* I am 28 years old, I work as a cashier, I live with my parents (mother, brothers and sister). I want to understand myself, what I'm doing wrong.
There is nothing good in my life, I am alone, I have not yet met my future husband, I have not met anyone, I have a monotonous life (work and home). I know that I need to walk, meet, but when I have work until 8 pm, you come home, have dinner, and then fall asleep.
I don’t really have any friends who could introduce me to someone. I have always been closed, I have fears in communication, I can’t overcome one.
I turned to a psychologist (young, inexperienced), there is no money for a good specialist. Somehow she helped me, I even felt a taste of life, became more cheerful, and then again returned to its previous state.
Yes, I am alone, I wanted to do psychology myself, it is difficult for me to give it alone. I’m afraid to be alone, I so want to have a family, a child, love, to be cheerful, cheerful, it’s easier to relate to everything, not to be afraid of communication, to stop being angry with others, not to envy, to love myself, I want to value myself, respect. I'm tired of being alone.
And self-pity, I know, this is a bad quality - to pity yourself and complain about your life. So everything was tired, there were suicide attempts earlier, now I don’t think about it, since my thoughts are busy with paying off my money debt faster, I have to wait until the summer.
And you know, I convince myself that if my duty ends, then I will change, but it’s not true, if since childhood I’ve been so taciturn, touchy, inanimate.
Somehow I searched the Internet for online psychologists for correspondence by email, there are none. They are paid, it turns out, there are no free ones. I’m trying to do something myself, I’m downloading books on psychology, I downloaded one book (how to become my own psychotherapist), there are exercises, but I can’t start doing them. Thoughts come "They still will not help me, why should I do this." How to get rid of such thoughts?
What to do with your life? How to make yourself change? What is needed for this? So many questions, but I can’t find the answers.
Hello Svetlana.
Start with what you accept as the fact that there IS a good life! You just don’t see it yet.
Want to see? (answer! YES!)
Why do you need it? Why do you need good? Why do you need love and a young man? Why do you need happiness and family? Why do you need joy and friends? WHAT FOR?
Answer realistically, not with general phrases, but specifically.
If you said "I don’t know ..." - you ran away ... You ran away from yourself real into yourself a fictional, illusory.
In short - honestly answer the questions above. You do not need to get rid of them - you have to answer! Here is your responsibility to yourself. Also, as you pay money debt responsibly, start to pay debt to yourself responsibly.
After all, having been born, you have already assumed this responsibility, then what right do you have now to evade it? And the fact that you are worthy of all this is also given from birth.
If you want to love yourself - love, there is a reason, provide yourself with this evidence. And do not dream that someone will do it for you. Everyone has a responsibility to themselves, first of all.
But you will see that when you really begin to give yourself respect, love, joy (even if it’s small, it doesn’t matter), people and the world will turn to face you and rush towards you. Take a look at my articles, there is information for you :)
Success to you, Svetlana, in acquiring - returning YOURSELF!
Good answer5 Bad answer0Hello Svetlana!
Hello Svetlana! I agree with my colleagues that until you start to change something, nothing will change. Think about how you stop talking to yourself, for example, with colleagues. Do you have them? Plan ahead what you will do on your weekend (remember what you wanted, but didn't do). Start taking care of yourself. Do not expect that someone for no reason will start to do this for you. You can wait a long time ... Nobody will change YOUR LIFE for you. Start by setting small goals and achieving them. Then the changes will begin! I am ready to cooperate with you in full-time work when you decide on this. I wish you success! Tatyana.
Good answer3 Bad answer0Hello Svetlana! Here is a free consultation for you: 1) Decide right now - what role are you in? Yes, that’s right - in a “child’s”, non-constructive, not taking responsibility for what happens to itself in their lives. Living as: "They owe me!" And, unfortunately, without value to themselves and their loved ones! And imagine for a moment that what you have in your life has been taken from you ......., and there are no more relatives and friends, no work, health, etc ...? How do you feel after that? Realize your feelings! 2) It is important for you not to avoid your feelings: fear, anger, etc., but rather to meet with them - to find the reasons why these feelings appeared and live ..., in other words - to make friends .., or to react, etc. .. 3) Any work, especially quality work, costs money (the equivalent of the energy expended), and the work of psychologists is no exception. Only you pay for yourself, and not just give it to someone! And, if you feel sorry for spending money on yourself, then this is the result! Get money with pleasure and spend money with pleasure, for this we earn, do not spare your beloved (it’s only reasonable that there are no extremes), then instead of disappointment, you will become happy and live an attractive, interesting life! 4) A meeting with a psychologist is not only psychological help to you, but above all - building new, high-quality relationships, where the MEETING of two people is an important component! And even if you don’t have a man yet, but if you improve your relations in a dialogue with a psychologist, then you can easily switch to relations with people around you - including and with men! 5) You can of course independently study both psychology and more, as well as make love alone, you can communicate by email - at a distance ... - But is this really what you sincerely want? 6) Accept yourself as you are, at least for one day (self-esteemless attitude!) And live with it - afraid, angry, dissatisfied with life, etc. ... And just become your own observer !!! Give it a try! And another time - do this in relation to your family ... And again - observe them and yourself. 7) Begin to treat yourself as if to the most beloved and dear person! Begin to make yourself (at least occasionally) gifts, pleasant, welcome, without regret ... And start looking at those things that used to be bypassed, in your thoughts telling yourself that if these things are good for me, then I will get them with feeling of joy and complete satisfaction! I let this happen in my life in the present! And then, literally before bedtime or after sleep - such thoughts for 1-2 minutes. no more and let go ..., the main thing is that at the end there should be the words: "For good!" That's all for today! "The road is overpowered by the one who walks!" Sincerely, Lyudmila K.
Good answer3 Bad answer0 
Hello Svetlana!
I think you are just too lazy to help yourself. Not because lazy, but because something makes you like that. After all, you really want to change, this is felt from your letter. I would recommend that you think about what kind of laziness it is, where it came from, and why it does not allow you to get everything that you so passionately desire. Something in your current state is so important that it makes you stop yourself trying to change. Try to understand that. Then it will become more clear what to do next. Regards, Elena.
Good answer1 Bad answer1
