How not to be nervous? Sedatives. How to calm down and not be nervous

We often say that our nerves are completely loose, that we need to calm our nerves. But how? Modern man lives in an atmosphere of constant stress and it is difficult for him to stop being nervous. We have little contact with nature, too often we meet strangers. We are affected by sounds that we seem to not pay attention to - city noises, other people's conversations, other people's music. We become irritable and pour out our irritation to those who are near or close the irritation in ourselves, but this leads to illness and shortens our life.

How to calm your nerves and relieve stress

First, you need to do your health. You need to see if you have enough vitamins and minerals - with a lack of these substances, the body does not work properly, we are more prone to stress and depression. Eat more chocolate, strawberries and bananas, which contribute to the production of hormones of joy in the body. Drink soothing herbal teas.

Learn to find joy in the little things - in good weather, in what children make us happy, in the smile of an outsider, in a good film, book, etc.

Protect yourself from unpleasant spectacles, switch an aggressive action movie to a quiet film or an educational program. Listen to soothing, measured, not dance, making the heart beat in an imposed fast rhythm, music.

More often encourage yourself for achievements, praise yourself, love yourself. A person who loves himself and accepts himself as such is much less likely to “break down”. Confidence in yourself and your actions makes you less vulnerable to criticism.

Meditation, gymnastics, showers will help calm down.

Inspire yourself that you are calm. For relaxation, take a walk, listen to the birds singing or the sound of the forest.

Exercise. Lack of movement is also one of the sources of stress. Sport can help not only keep the body in good shape, but also strengthen the will, and therefore help to calm the nerves.

Use the healing features of water - swim, visit the pool, take a contrast shower.

Learning to control ourselves

Set a goal to calm your nerves. Analyze why you are nervous, understand that in many cases your reaction is not justified by the current situation.

Learn to control yourself. Relieve aggression in a way that is safe for everyone - aim it at achieving any elusive goals and overcoming obstacles.

How to learn to calm your nerves

In the modern world, every person experiences serious emotional stress, stress, nervous breakdowns. Of course, in such a situation, you must be able to take control of your emotions and learn to calm your nerves. Of course, there are many ways to calm down, so everyone can choose what is right for him.

The simplest method, which, however, is not all resorted to to calm the nerves, is to count to ten and only then start talking. Do not forget that it is necessary to breathe deeply - this will saturate the blood with oxygen, make the brain work more efficiently, which means that you will not think about the moments that disturb you.

You need to be able to be distracted from an object that annoys or annoys you. It is necessary to maintain optimism in any situation.

Do not let yourself worry. Do not blame or blame yourself for what happened. It would be better to analyze why this situation arose and what needs to be done so that it does not happen again.

You need to rest more often. To stop being nervous, you need to play sports, walk in the fresh air, because when we get tired, we become irritable and nervous, and this does not affect our health in the best way.

You do not need to constantly think about the negative aspects in your past. Better to think only about positive events. As soon as you remember something negative, you need to be distracted and occupy yourself with some interesting business.

Want to calm your nerves? Then you need to eat as little as possible products that contain stimulants - these include coffee and strong tea. In addition, alcohol and tobacco also negatively affect our ability to calm our nerves.

Try not to rush. Constant rush is the cause of stressful situations, so you need to learn how to manage your time. Try to avoid overload.

Learn to ignore minor troubles or treat them with humor.

Resign yourself to the fact that you are not perfect and never will be. It’s impossible for everyone to enjoy it, and if you make increased demands on yourself, then nothing good will come of it. Do not waste your time and nerves.

How to stop being nervous and be calm

Sometimes, even the person who is usually calm and poised can feel nervous. The causes of this nervousness can be some troubles and problems in the family or at work, chronic fatigue and others. The state of nervousness adversely affects health. Therefore, you must make every effort to overcome it.

Nervousness will not help solve problems, but rather will only aggravate the reaction to problems. You need to try to understand what caused it. If possible, you need to moderate the psychological and physical stress, not bad also to calm the nerves to take a vacation or a day off.

Equally important is your dream. First of all, you need to make sure that the sleeping place is as comfortable as possible, and the room in which you sleep is periodically ventilated. Often, nervousness appears due to an elementary lack of sleep. If possible, increase the rest time.

The simplest joys of life

Nutrition is also an important factor. Heavy, indigestible food will not allow the body to fully recover. You should adhere to a sparing diet, eat easily digestible foods, but do not reduce calories. To stop being nervous, try not to drink drinks that excite the nervous system: cocoa, tea, coffee. Or at least if possible, limit their use. Try to replace them with natural juices, decoctions of herbs, mineral water. At night you can drink sedatives, which are sold in pharmacies.

To calm your nerves, you should walk more often, breathe fresh air. If you live in a large city, try to get out to the park or the forest at least for the weekend. A calm outdoor recreation very well restores nerves.

Looking for joy in everything

Any change of scenery can positively affect. If you want to stop being nervous, change the situation if possible. Embark on a trip abroad, to the sea, to the mountains. New impressions will have a good effect on the emotional and psychological state.

You need to try to get as many positive emotions as possible. Doing what you enjoy. Going to cafes or parties, playing sports, perfectly calms and tones swimming. You can watch entertaining and humorous programs, go to the cinema or to the theater. The more positive emotions you have in your life, the less space you get for nervousness.

“All diseases are from nerves!” - Today, this phrase is repeated by many. If you find a way to stop being nervous over trifles and become calmer, then, as they say, you will be happy and healthy ...

You can try to become calm by using the recommendations of psychologists, they often give advice: start meditating or throw out the negative on paper, do not keep it in yourself, speak affirmations, go to a deserted place and shout properly. As a rule, all methods offer to reset the already accumulated voltage, but what to do so that it does not occur? How to stop worrying about trifles?

Doctors meet with such patients every day, they always ask a question about how to stop being nervous. Everyone has excitement, stress and its various manifestations. Most often, sedatives are prescribed, something harmless and light, on the herbs. But there is practically no effect or it is short-lived.

So how do you stop getting nervous over trifles?

Now we are not talking about severe stresses, such as job loss or serious problems in personal life. We are talking about small things that poison our lives and our loved ones - the elevator is delayed, the nail has broken, the phone is dead at the wrong time, it’s crowded in transport, etc.

This is an annoyance at the slightest occasion when everyone is furious at home and at work. Inexplicable fears or inexplicable anxieties from scratch may appear. Often the excitement of an excellent student before an exam of the same nature.

These events seem to be trifles from the side. For an annoyed person this is a disaster, he begins to freak out, then he is left without strength, but it does not work to calm down and not worry.

Meanwhile, there is a way to significantly increase your stress resistance. You can become calm and balanced with the help of the training "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan.

Why do experiences arise

For some, the reaction to stress is manifested by feelings and fears, in others, skin rashes and itching, in others - an upset bowel or arrhythmia. Everyone is bad, but bad in different ways. And this is due to the characteristics of the psyche of a particular person. Understanding this device, you can greatly simplify your life.

Training "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan reveals the true causes of irritation. Any person experiences stress and dissatisfaction with life when he is unaware of his natural desires or ignores them, trying to live according to someone else's program. It seems to us that we want a little: love, prosperity, world peace. And what does a person really want? Sometimes we can only guess about this!

For example, a tender, sensitive girl loses peace. She - a representative of the visual vector - was born for love, she needs elevated feelings and strong emotional connections like air. This is her way to deal with the fear of loneliness. A break in emotional bonds can lead to causeless fears, anxiety, panic attacks, sleep disturbances, and vision problems.

The “pampushka” is nervous, which by any means wants to become a slender model. She exhausts herself with endless diets and many hours in the gym. Then I want to bite someone. She’s ready to give everything for the pie. And kilograms continue to spoil “problem” places.

How to stop getting nervous and worried

To stop being nervous and worried, you need to understand those people with whom you have to deal and contact. Do you understand them? Are you sure?

It happens that a person sees in others the manifestation of some character traits that he himself does not have, and he considers these properties to be defects or gaps in education. Experiences and constant indignation shake his nerves. And the irritant does not need to strengthen the nervous system, he sleeps peacefully anyway. In systemic-vector psychology, the reaction of people to the annoying behavior of others is explained.

There are people who lose their temper when faced with slowness and slowness at home or at work. It is incomprehensible how you can swing and turn in one direction for half an hour, when during this time you can run back and forth. These are carriers of the skin vector. They themselves are fast and agile. They can do several things at once. And write, and listen, also communicate on the phone. Slow, balanced person who is the carrier of the anal vector, they consider it a brake. From indignation from the lost time, they can begin to itch, and their skin is covered with a rash.

And slow people get into the nerves of skin hogs, who take it all at once, do a blunder and often do not complete what was started. Well, how can you become calmer and not be nervous? It is necessary to complete, bring to perfect condition, and not toss halfway. When such people are pulled and rushed, they often have complaints about interruptions in the work of the heart, abdominal pain and violation of the stool.

How to stop being nervous over trifles and be healthy

System-vector psychology explains that a person always has in his asset the appropriate properties for the realization of his natural desires.

A girl with an anal vector was born to be a hostess, she is homely and cozy, knows how to cook, sew and knit deliciously. She is unlikely to want to be a model. Her natural desire is to create a family, lead a house, bring comfort, raise children. She, with a penchant for working with papers, assiduous and meticulous, will not become a successful sales manager. Make her engage in an unloved affair and at the same time push and rush - she is provided with experiences and stress.
  A quick and dexterous owner of a skin vector who needs change like air, will want a change of impressions and movement at work. He is not able to get carried away with monotonous reports. Therefore, it is difficult to imagine him as a calm accountant. Deprive him of his movements, put him in the office to deal with some papers, problems may appear - flickering, anxiety and itching, pain in the spine.

Become calmer and learn to live among people

We are constantly nervous about trifles, and our everyday life is composed of a series of small events. And the meeting, and the look, and the conversation can be an occasion for experience. Learn to understand others, and they will cease to annoy you. A look filled with understanding and joy will ultimately meet with warmth and understanding in return.

Alas, for many of us, stress has become an integral part of everyday life. Being stressed all the time is not the best way to spend time. Moreover, long-term stress negatively affects the state of the body, provoking the development of many health problems, including asthma, heart disease and diabetes. Is there a way out in such a situation? Learn to calm down! Today you have a day off, or, conversely, a tense situation in full swing, if you approach the matter correctly, you can always relax and begin to enjoy life. Always remember the simple rule: "Relax!"

Steps

Have a rest day

Set aside all your duties. When you want to arrange a day of rest and relaxation, the main thing is to prepare in advance. It is difficult to really relax and rest if you have to focus on the implementation of a working draft or look after a screaming baby. Below is a list of things you can do in advance. Of course, life circumstances are different for everyone, so some of your duties may not coincide with the list below:

• Take an extraordinary day off at work.   If necessary, take the days on account of the vacation. Note that more often than not, management expects you to warn about this in advance - usually within a few weeks.
• If you have children, hire a nanny.   Of course, children are a great happiness, but sometimes they can turn our lives into a real nightmare. It’s not worth the risk, otherwise it may turn out that your whole day off will be spent playing a game of “frogs” and changing diapers. It is better on this day to entrust the supervision of the child with a responsible nanny.
• If necessary, make preparations for the trip.   Sometimes for relaxation you just need to change the usual scenario. If you want to leave somewhere out of the city, buy tickets or reserve a hotel for your stay in advance so that you do not have to do it in a hurry at the last moment.

1. Pamper yourself and take a relaxing bath or shower.   When you still decide to get out of bed (and on the day of rest you can do it when you want), start your day with a relaxing bath or shower. It is proven that a warm bath or shower helps calm the mind, relieve muscle tension and tidy up chaotic thoughts. More importantly, the bath helps you feel good   and makes it possible to forget at least for a while about all the problems and focus on the pleasant sensations of your body - in other words to relax.

   Have a cup of coffee or tea with friends.   If drinks containing caffeine cause you a headache or provoke nervousness, you should not include this item in the list of must-do items for a day of relaxation. If you think that a little caffeine does not hurt you, a cup of coffee in the company of friends will help you relax and distract from everyday stress. In fact, according to some studies, if a person drinks coffee with people whose communication with him brings joy, this has a pronounced relaxing effect on him. On the other hand, if you drink coffee alone, it can even increase your stress.

2. Give yourself the opportunity to go in for a hobby that usually doesn't have enough time.   Consider yourself the second Picasso? Long been dying of the desire to pick up an old guitar and play some original compositions? Today is the time to treat yourself. A day of relaxation is good, which gives you the opportunity to devote a lot of time to all those things that you secretly would like   to do in those long hours when engaged in the implementation of necessary life responsibilities. Now you can not be afraid to spend several hours (or even all day, if you want) to bring joy to yourself. Here are some things you might want to do:

   • Try to do something creative.   When was the last time you drew a picture, wrote a song, or composed a story? If you cannot remember, you might want to do something creative today and complete the project, working at your own pace.
   • Engage in minor repairs or home improvements.   A small repair or home improvement work can bring you a feeling of deep satisfaction (in addition, it is a great long-term investment of time and energy, as it will reduce the cost of maintaining the house).
   • Read a book.   Real, time-tested paper books are becoming rare today. Nothing calms a person more than a few hours by the fireplace. spent reading your favorite book. Think, maybe this relaxation method is right for you.
   • Play video games.   There is nothing wrong with lounging on the couch for hours playing video games. However, if this activity already takes a lot of time in your daily life, it is better to consider some other hobby that you usually pay attention to much less often.

3. Try a simple meal.   Delicious food is what you just need on a day of relaxation. Do you want to improve your cooking skills (and save some money you would spend in a cafe or restaurant)? Try to prepare for yourself and for your friends, who can spend time with you, delicious and nutritious food. On the Internet you can find thousands of diverse recipes. A few minutes to search on Yandex - and you already have several dozen recipes for your favorite dish. You can also choose any dish from a wide variety of recipes on our website. .

   • If you don’t like to cook, do not hesitate to reserve a table in your favorite restaurant or order food delivery to your home. Delicious food is one of the indisputable sources of pleasure for a person, do not neglect it on a holiday day!

4. Do things without haste.   If you organized yourself a day of rest, this does not mean that you can not do anything useful. It will be useful to do some things that you will still need to do in your free time. This will not only bring you satisfaction that you have done something meaningful, it also allows you to reduce stress levels in the long run. In the end, any mandatory work that you complete today will not hang over your soul tomorrow. The following is a list of things you might want to consider:

   • Pay bills
   • Send letters and parcels
   • Submit your resume to positions of interest
   • Solve Support Issues
   • Take care of affairs related to government bodies (for example, check and pay fines in the traffic police).

5. Watch a movie.   Watching movies is the most calm and relaxing way to have fun (of course, if you do not choose to watch a horror movie or thriller). Sit back on the couch next to your loved one or call friends to visit. A few pacifying hours spent watching a long time favorite movies or new cinema, will be a great end to a day of relaxation.

   • If you have the opportunity, you can even arrange a movie night with friends. You can choose movies of a certain subject (for example, an art house) or choose films at random. The choice is yours!
   • If your budget allows, you can enjoy watching a movie on the big screen by going to the cinema with friends. If all your friends are busy that day, you can go to the cinema and alone, although not everyone likes to watch movies alone. If you do not want to waste money, try to find morning sessions with inexpensive tickets.

6. Spend the evening in public (or at home!)   Some people enjoy having completed a day of rest at a fun party in a nightclub, while others prefer to stay home and go to bed earlier. You and only you   decide what the perfect ending to your day of rest will be!

   • Do not think. that you simply must go somewhere to have fun in the evening, even if you don’t feel like it. Your friends will not go anywhere until tomorrow if you decide to skip one evening at the club and go to bed early.
   • And vice versa, if you have the opportunity, go with friends to a nightclub and have fun from the heart, as in the good old days. Of course, you should not go on a spree if the next day you have a responsible event planned. If you return home late from the party late, tomorrow you are unlikely to have the strength for labor feats.

7. If you are old enough, a little bit of alcohol will even come in handy (especially if you are wise to approach this issue). Face the truth - work and everyday responsibilities can plunge anyone into stress. Sometimes we just need to relax a bit with alcohol. This is not a big deal, especially if you know the measure. For example, if you drink one or two glasses of wine in the company of friends at the end of a difficult day, this is unlikely to hurt you somehow. According to some reports, moderate consumption of alcoholic beverages (for example, a small bottle of beer daily) is actually even good for human health.

   • At the same time, do not forget that excessive drinking will only increase stress. Not to mention the consequences of excessive alcohol consumption, such as a hangover, nausea and other unpleasant physiological manifestations, loss of control due to a large dose of alcohol can lead to incorrect decisions that will ruin your life for a long time (and can even lead to jail).

8. Find a constructive way to vent your overflowing energy.   There is a good way to deal with suppressed stress - to direct it in a different direction, where excess energy and tension will help to do something useful. For example, feelings of anger and anger will make it much easier to do a long, intense workout (and most importantly, exercise is a good way to reduce your stress level and improve your mood; below you will find more information on this). Another good way is to sublimate stress energy into creative activity, such as writing stories or playing a musical instrument.

   • In our example, with unexpected work at the weekend, constructive behavior would be to go to the gym after work, and not immediately go home. This would make it possible to derive health benefits from anger. You could run around, make several approaches to the barbell, and if you are very furious, you can beat the punching bag with all your heart.

9. Try meditation.   Although this advice seems fanciful and trendy to some, it has been proven that the ability to meditate helps many people to cope with stress, in other words, to relax. There is no universal “right” way to meditate. Generally speaking, in order to start meditation, you need to get out of tense situations, close your eyes, breathe slowly and focus on getting rid of annoying, anxious thoughts. Some people need to accept the complex poses of yoga gymnastics for meditation, others mentally imagine certain images or pictures, while others repeat aloud simple words or mantras. There are people who go around in circles during meditation!

   • If you need more detailed information on this subject (including detailed instructions on how to free your mind from annoying thoughts), you can find many excellent articles on meditation on our website.

10. First of all, draw up an action plan and stick to it.   All of the above techniques can be extremely useful if applied wisely. However, if you want stress relief to bring you satisfaction and benefit, you need to try deal with it.   The temptation to escape from stress at work, at school or at home is, of course, very strong, but the fastest way to get rid of stress is to fight it. In addition, the satisfaction of a job well done will help reduce stress for a long time, even if you first have to work hard to achieve your goal.

    • In our example, it will be optimal to try to complete the task as quickly as possible, for example, on Friday evening or Saturday morning. Then you will have a lot of free time left to realize all your plans for the weekend. When you come to work on Monday, it will be useful to talk with your boss and discuss how it is better to organize the work in order to avoid such emergency rumors in the future.
    • Do not delay work at the last moment. If you postpone the work now, it will only increase your stress, especially if you need to complete the work by a certain date. If you do the work right away, you can then sincerely enjoy the rest. Otherwise, you will constantly worry about the fact that you still have to do work postponed for later.

Exercise more often.   As we already mentioned, it was proved that one intense training can help quickly get rid of stress for a short time. However regular   playing sports is also an effective way to maintain a positive, calm attitude towards life for a long time. Although it is still not fully understood which biological mechanisms provide this effect, scientific studies show that regular exercise can provide reliable protection against health problems caused by stress, especially depression.

• On our site you can find many articles that in an understandable and intelligible way will give you information on how to make physical exercises a part of your life, including examples of complexes for different levels of physical fitness.

Have a rest more.   The quality of sleep can have a huge impact on our well-being while awake. Try to remember the last time you didn’t sleep all night, and how you felt the next day. Even one sleepless night can spoil your well-being for the whole day after that, and a constant lack of sleep can be a leading factor in causing stress in the long run. There is evidence that a long-term lack of proper sleep increases the risk of stress-related illnesses, such as heart disease, stroke, and many other diseases. If you want to be healthy and live without stress, ensure yourself a full, long sleep every night (it is considered that the duration of a night's sleep for an adult should be from seven to nine hours).

• In addition, it is important to understand that the relationship between sleep and stress works in the opposite direction. In other words, just as lack of sleep can cause stress, stress itself can cause insomnia.

• Change your position: research has shown that lying down is much easier to relax than standing up.
• Some people advocate the idea of \u200b\u200ba “refreshing sleep," arguing that a short afternoon nap of 15-20 minutes is a great way to relax and rejuvenate during a busy day. However, other people say that it is difficult for them to wake up completely after a short break for daytime sleep.
• Here are some more ideas to help you calm down:
  • Look at the rain or clouds.
  • Have someone read a book out loud to you until you fall asleep.
  • Wash with cold water.
  • Draw with pencils or paints. And do not worry about what kind of drawing you get in the end.
• If your nervousness and excitement intensifies after a cup of tea or coffee, try replacing them with caffeine-free counterparts. Caffeine can cause stress in some people, especially if they become addicted to this substance.

Warnings

• Rest can significantly increase your ability for creative activity (of course, if you do not go to the other extreme and start to be lazy). If you sleep, relax or dream about something, it will help to replenish the supply of your creative powers. Next time, when you feel a creative crisis, break away from work for an hour and you will feel updated.
• Do not let the desire to relax and rest distract you from serious matters (for example, from work). If you are in the process of carrying out a serious project, it is best to arrange short breaks for 10-15 minutes every hour. If you are doing small tasks, make sure you complete the next one before resting.

Absolute calm - this is the state of our body, which is considered to be the norm. With him, a person is relaxed, can fully control himself, adequately assess the situation, comprehend what is happening and make informed decisions. Not all people experience such calmness, especially in non-standard life situations, including during communication. Thus, the question arises, how to stop being nervous during communication and learn to control yourself? Our tips will help solve this problem.

The words "no need to be nervous" well help bring a person to a normal state of rabies.
  Stas Yankovsky

Where does nervousness come from?

Nervousness occurs when irritation factors appear. They may be different, but as soon as they begin to affect a person, the latter loses concentration and all his mental and physical energy is turned towards these same stimuli, switching all attention to themselves.

At the same time, a priori nervous excitement cannot be considered a complete deviation from the norm. On the contrary, it is necessary for a person to recognize positive or negative situations in life and to react to them or avoid them. But since it can be difficult to stop being nervous when communicating, and this condition is uncomfortable, it is important to be able to get rid of tension.

The response to nerve stimuli should always be adequate. If the nervousness is excessive, then this already becomes a serious problem. Nervous tension turns into stress, and entails serious consequences on the mental and physiological level.

For whom is excessive nervousness dangerous?

Young people are most prone to nervousness, because their psyche still does not know how to cope with everyday stresses. But even at a young age, there are people who endure problem situations easier and easier, and there are those whose nervous system is excessively vulnerable. It is this category of people most often experiencing problems in relationships with other people, communication, self-realization.

Communication is a fundamental process in the formation of personality, a necessary condition for any development. That is why excessive nervousness and embarrassment in communicating with others is a serious problem, due to which there is a lack of understanding, inability to concentrate on the subject of discussion, lack of satisfaction from the conversation and, as a result, narrowing of the circle of communication.

At an early age, this situation is considered as natural, but over time, if the problem persists, difficulties worsen and a person cannot harmoniously integrate into society, realize himself, develop. That is why it is important to take care of reducing nervousness, until the complete disposal of it.

Why are we starting to get nervous when talking?

The reasons for this condition may be different. Nervousness appears when we only make acquaintance and do not know the person with whom we have to communicate. There is a natural situation of fear of rejection or misunderstanding.

This moment of nervous excitement lasts only for a while, until we get used to a stranger and define common interests. If for some people this slightest stress can pass completely without a trace, then people with a more vulnerable psyche continue to perceive a person with a certain apprehension and this becomes an obstacle to conversation.

The next cause of nervousness may be the status of the person with whom you should communicate. If we have to talk with the boss, strict father, man or woman, to whom we do not feel sympathy. Each of them causes you certain emotions - irritants that can lead to tension, fear or constraint.

How to stop being nervous?

Of course, no one will give you a universal recipe for how to stop being nervous when communicating. If there is a problem, then we must deal with it comprehensively and understand the reason. Often, it lies precisely in the fact that a person is afraid to be misunderstood or rejected.

A self-sufficient, self-confident person who knows how to listen and also knows how to clearly convey his thoughts to the interlocutor, whatever he is, will probably never encounter the problem of nervousness during communication. That is why you need to work on yourself, be open to other people and expand your circle of acquaintances in order to accumulate experience in various situations in communication and be able to respond to them.

It is also important to be able to evoke positive emotions in the interlocutor and are not afraid to be misunderstood or rejected. In this case, you can safely talk on different topics, without experiencing absolutely no difficulties and without being subjected to any stress. Well, if such arise, then you either stop communicating with a person, or reduce it to a minimum.

It is important to understand that we cannot be liked by everyone, without exception. Some people are more active in communication, more open and interested in new acquaintances, while others are closed and prefer to discuss less.

A few rules to help reduce nervousness:

• Whatever you have to communicate with, always remember the purpose of the conversation.
• Know how to listen to the interlocutor and always give him the opportunity to speak.
• Find something in common and try to show sincere interest in that area of \u200b\u200bthe interlocutor’s life that is at least somehow interesting to you.
• Don't be afraid to ask questions, even if you are completely unsure of what to ask.
• Be attentive to topics that are incomprehensible to you and all the more unpleasant, no matter how much you want to succeed in communicating with the person you need.
• Never be imposed on people who do not show any initiative in communication.

Work on yourself

Get ready for communication always. In order to enjoy communication, you yourself must have enough interests, comprehensively developed. By reducing the number of obscure topics, you can easily find the subject of discussion and talk with people of different ages. Thus, nervousness will not be the place, and you can safely share your knowledge.

Avoid empty talk, chatter and gossip. Try to share knowledge, experience, ideas. If a person is pleasant to you and your sympathy is mutual, excitement and constraint during communication will disappear. Take it into service!

Video: How to overcome fears in communication?

How to stop being shy

Shyness to one degree or another is characteristic of each person. However, if your shyness is a stable trait of character, and, in addition, interferes with you, then you must immediately start a fight with it. Otherwise, such increased shyness can lead to the fact that your life plans may be violated.

First of all, you need to deal with the causes of your shyness. Think about what you are not comfortable with, and what has become a reason for embarrassment? No matter how complicated the problem is, it is solvable. If the matter is in your appearance - it is as easy as shelling pears. Change your wardrobe and hairstyle.

If the matter is in slight speech defects, then only a specialist will help you to cope with this. If you consider yourself a boring interlocutor (or, worse, they tell you about it in plain text), then reading can help you - be up to date with the news and it will be much easier for you.

If you don’t see any direct reason for shyness, then most likely you are just used to consider yourself shy. Here you can help a kind of psychological "fitting" on yourself the image of a confident person. Begin to lead confidently and openly at home. Train your walk. Give a speech (you can do it yourself, there are a lot of self-study manuals on the network). Over time, you will feel that you are able to behave as confidently among others.

You can take as an example any of your friends if you think his behavior is quite relaxed. Carefully study how this person behaves in various situations, and try to copy his behavior - this is certainly not necessary to be shy. This is the case when imitation will only benefit you.

Video: How to stop being nervous? 10 proven ways

There is another psychological trick. Find an even more closed person than you, and try to lead him. That is, to become his leader, which will help him become more confident. This practice will help you and yourself become more confident in yourself, and pull up your comrade.

Another method is to imagine the most negative consequences from your own actions (or inaction). What is so terrible to happen if you are denied or rude? Get ready for the fact that everything will be bad, and relax in this regard. In the end, acceptance will help you better relieve resentment, and you will become more self-confident.

Hi people! Who remembers the fairy tale of the Brothers Grimm “Smart Elsa”? The plot consists of how the girl came up with various terrible situations, then she was upset because of them and made everyone around feel sad. Such tension, groundless fears and fears are a state of excitement, which greatly interferes with a person's quality of life. What is excitement, why and why does it arise? How to deal with it? How to stop worrying about trifles?

The state of excitement is associated with internal tension, experiencing internal emotional discomfort and anticipation of adverse events. Is there a difference between fear and excitement?

The fundamental difference from fear is that a person is not afraid of specific objects: height, darkness, disease. But excitement is based on causeless fears, sometimes even too far-fetched.

Here are some suggestions:

1. Do not take excitement as your enemy. It is designed to mobilize all the forces of the body and to adequately respond to the stress. A normal level of excitement is necessary for interaction with the outside world. But suddenly the reactions become uncontrollable, then the stress becomes chronic. Check out.
2. Control your thoughts. Thought is proved or disproved by experience. It is useful to turn negative emotions into positive ones, to seek good in everything.
3. Divide the paper into 2 columns: “What will happen if this happens?” And “What will happen if this does not happen?” Start filling them out, compare the arguments from each column. Thus, the logical reflection of your thoughts will be arranged on paper. This technique is great sobering and leads to a normal state.
4. Every day is full of their worries. I recommend always remember the phrase Scarlett from "Gone with the Wind": "I will think about it tomorrow."
5. In the moments of a fit of excitement, focus on your goal throughout your life. This refocusing helps a lot. You will immediately understand that skirmishing in line, being late for study is a mere trifle.
6. Do not invent new problems, do not replay in your mind how everything can happen not in the most successful way. Excessive and frequent disturbances lead to neurosis. Exciting thoughts are especially dangerous during pregnancy.
7. Do not live in a hurry and bustle, live measuredly. Find time for sports, activities you love, walks. Read.
8. Always have several backup plans of action for different outcomes of the situation, this will help to be at least a little more confident.

What do frequent baseless unrest lead to?

Pleasant is not enough:

• all chances to get sick with diseases of the gastrointestinal tract, psyche increase;
• mental abilities weaken, desire and interest in work disappears;
• it’s impossible to think of anything other than a problem that worries too much;
• diverting attention to trifles, we do not notice the most important thing in life, which is much more valuable.

Do not find fault with people, worry about the dirt in the house, spoiled food, poor purchases, poor grades of children at school. This is not deadly.

Get rid of the guilty guilt. Especially in those cases where you could not help, where you could not influence the situation.

It is never too late with new thoughts reloaded in a positive way. Whenever insidious excitement sets in, do not forget to say: “I forbid myself to think of such trifles!” Do not plunge deeper and deeper into the abyss of far-fetched negative events, do not push yourself to self-destruction.