How to recognize lies by correspondence. How to understand that you are being deceived in correspondence

In everyday life, we are often deceived.

Moreover, a lie can be both insignificant and very large.

Someone simply deceives customers in the store, and someone weaves untangleable webs of lies.

Someone is lying out of boredom, someone is to hide their true nature, but for someone lying is just a bad habit.

Moreover, in most cases it is very easy to distinguish the truth from the lie!

So if you want understand when a person is lying - Success Diary will help you figure it out!

Tips to help you find out if a person is lying

A truthful person uses a lot of gestures all the time.

After all, this is how he can throw out all his emotions and stir up another person.

The liar, on the other hand, tries not to gesticulate, because he understands perfectly well that the wrong gesture will betray him.

And when a person is lying, he tries to hardly gesticulate.

When a person is lying, he tries to abstract himself from the interlocutor, hiding behind a table or computer.

If you want to know that a person is lying, pay attention to the number of touches on the face.

For a liar, it goes off scale.

Also, the liar is constantly twirling something in his hands: a pen, a piece of paper, a tie, a lock of hair, etc.

Although you shouldn't pay too much attention to this gesture, since there simply exist, constantly twirling or twisting something.

Very often, before a lie, a person takes time out - drinks a cup of coffee, lights a cigarette or starts coughing.

During such a short break, the person has time to think about another lie.

Often, during a lie, a person leaves the interlocutor or hugs himself.
During a conversation, the liar can also abruptly move away, and his gestures can become closed.
Liars are usually tense.

You can find out that a person is lying by details.

Usually, with more detailed questions, liars become confused and give themselves away.

However, one cannot judge the truth or falsehood by gestures alone.

Probably, in 95% of the lie is accompanied by some other signs. Let's see which ones.

How to understand that a person is lying? Interesting signs:

Role-playing games

A liar man plays the role he needs: he shows how happy and joyful he is, thereby hiding the truth.

If you see a person's insincere behavior, then you can be sure that he is lying.

An example of this behavior is 2 girlfriends, one of whom admires the other's blouse.

In fact, a blouse can be so disgusting that a friend in her soul gloats at the ugliness of her rival.

Turning on the fool

In this case, the liar may pretend not to understand the issue at all. As a result, the opponent cannot find what to ask and the liar sighs with relief.

Guilt

Very often, liars take advantage of the situation and turn the situation in their favor.

The best defense is offense

What can I say?

In order not to reveal the truth, the liar begins to accuse the interlocutor of all sorts of sins and translates the arrows.

Crushed by a sense of guilt, the interlocutor immediately stops digging into the truth.

Justification

The liar will constantly make excuses in all possible ways, and blame others.

In order to avoid commenting on a situation, a liar may have amnesia for no reason.

He can immediately forget about the essence of the event and start turning on the fool.

Call to God

In moments when a liar has nothing to say in his own defense, he hides behind religion.

He will claim that he is a deeply religious person and his religion would not allow him to act in one way or another.

Oiling

But this method is used by all people, without exception, when they want to muddy someone's consciousness and distract from the main topic.

Zero to ground

The liar will try to evade the answer to the question by any means.

He can find a lot of work, keep himself busy, just to avoid answering.

Indeed, in this case, you will have to lie and get entangled in your lies even more!

I suggest you watch an interesting video about

how to recognize a deceiver using real examples.

And I also want to say that although we have analyzed the main signs of a liar, no one really uses them.

Because in most cases, we just don't need the truth.

Truth can be bitter, but flattery is always sweet and pleasantly warms the soul.

Is not it?

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There are no absolutely honest people in nature. We all embellish events a little, lie to our rescue or fail to fully tell the truth. We are deceived by family members and close people, not to mention colleagues or business partners. Nevertheless, the secret always becomes clear and it is quite possible to expose the liar. How to bite through a liar?

Non-verbal signals

Lack of candor is primarily determined by. A person who is deceiving is given a pose, movement,. By deceiving the interlocutor, a person creates a stressful situation for himself, because lying is unnatural. The body painfully reacts to the truth and betrays itself. Non-verbal cues are the easiest way to expose a liar. Here they are:

It is not by chance that this part of the face is called the mirror of the soul. It is in them that the first indicator of lies is determined, because it is much more difficult to lie with the eyes than with the tongue. The expression of the eyes is almost beyond the control of the wearer. The person hiding information does not try to maintain eye contact with the interlocutor. Ask him at this moment a question. If there is nothing to hide, then the person will look away to ponder the answer and remember reliable information. And if there is nothing to remember, then the direction of the gaze will not change. The liar, by focusing his gaze and giving out pre-prepared data, blinks less often. The direction of the gaze is also important. If the other person is looking to the right, he is probably lying.

Movement

If the other person's question is caught off guard, the liar uses distraction to stall the time and come up with a plausible answer. This is expressed in actions that do not carry a specific meaning. A man ties his shoelaces, straightens his tie, goes over objects, examines the interior. The main thing is to discern a distraction in the movements of the interlocutor.

If the interlocutor has something to hide, only one side of the body will be active. The person may twitch their shoulder or swing their leg, but in general their movements will be stiff and unnatural, and their manner of speaking will be slow.

When communicating with a person, pay attention to his lips. If, when making an appointment, the person pursed his lip, then the date is unlikely to take place. Pursing lips -. Do not lose sight of the smile of the interlocutor. With deceitful, ostentatious friendliness, a fake smile will be noticeable.

- a storehouse of information. Asymmetric facial expressions tell the interlocutor about lies (smile with one corner of the mouth, etc.), as well as scratching the ear or nose. Sincere surprise cannot last longer than five seconds. If the expression of amazement lingers on your face, you should know that the person knew in advance what you just told him.

Deserve separate consideration. A person who, in the course of a conversation, holds himself by the neck with his hands, is afraid to let the interlocutor talk. Lies are also signaled by crossed arms on the chest, intertwined fingers and palms hidden in pockets. The liar unconsciously seeks to hide his palms from prying eyes. When speaking the truth, the person reinforces the story with gestures, emphasizing key phrases. The liar does not do this, as he tries to control his own emotions as much as possible.

The liar gives out a speech

Speech and intonation betray a liar as much as body language. Paying attention to the other person during the conversation and practicing in exposing liars, you will be able to determine insincerity from the first words. How does speech betray liars?

Hypocrisy and pretense. This is often seen in a women's team or when meeting two acquaintances who have not seen for several years. Both interlocutors treat each other with hostility or indifference, but politeness does not allow expressing their own opinions openly. This is where the feigned mannerism, friendliness and cordiality in conversation arise. All this can be seen with an unarmed eye. If a loved one behaves this way, he is lying.
The liar, not wanting to express truthful data, answers the questions with the words of the interlocutor. "Did you turn off the sound on my phone?" - "No, it was not me who turned off the sound on your phone."
The liar speaks more slowly. He weighs and ponders the words, because he is afraid to blabber and say too much. A lot of facts can also be added to the main story, without which it is quite possible to do.

Often, a person hiding the truth turns on the “fool” and speaks as if he does not understand the essence of the issue. This happens until the interlocutor runs out of questions. Then the liar calms down.
Acting on the principle that the best defense is attack, the liar goes on the attack. He blames the opponent and turns the arrows in every possible way. Feeling guilty, the interlocutor stops trying to get to the bottom of the truth.
The liar's speech is not grammatically correct. It is often confused, repeated and expressed incorrectly.
If during a conversation the interlocutor constantly changes the subject or is happy about it and noticeably relaxes, you can be sure that you have not heard a word of truth until this moment.
If inaccuracies arise in the interlocutor's narration and the story did not arouse confidence in you, ask them to retell the events in the reverse order. The liar will become confused and nervous, and the truth speaker will not be difficult to do this.
To avoid exposure and not compromise himself, the liar can pretend that he has forgotten some facts or the essence of the event, and then, according to the scenario, the inclusion of a fool.
The deceivers do not explain the facts and shy away from questions that require a direct answer.
A person who does not tell the truth will often clarify in a conversation what is honest, even if there is no need to do so. The liar insists that the interlocutor confirm that he believes him. A truthful person does not need this.

All of the above signs are noticeable when communicating "face to face", but what if the person and the movements of the interlocutor are not visible?

How to recognize a lie from correspondence?

Other tools and platforms for the exchange of electronic messages are incredibly popular and relevant these days. How to recognize a liar in this case, because the person is not visible, and the letters of the letter do not differ in emotionality and expressiveness?

Sooner or later, the virtual interlocutor will begin to contradict himself. It is difficult to think it over in detail and. The facts from the liar's early stories will contradict the stories of the present.

Lies are superficial. She is not supported by emotions and experiences. Therefore, the information and stories of the liar are vague, do not differ in specifics and the expression of their own thoughts.

People (both real and) have their own style of communication. If atypical terms and slips appear in a conversation, you should know that you are a liar.

Deceivers often give out only positive information about themselves and tell different interlocutors about the same event in different ways. The result is confusion and lies are exposed.

The liar persistently repeats the same data. The sages of the East said: “You told me once - I believed, you repeated - I had a doubt, you said a third time - I understood that you were not telling the truth”.

March 22, 2014 4:39 pm

If you closely follow the speech and gestures of the interlocutor, you can understand how frank he is with you. From the first lines I want to keep your attention on such a moment: if a person does not deceive you, this does not guarantee the reliability of the information you receive from him. For sure, you can only know one thing - if he misleads you, he does not do it on purpose. He just believes in what he is talking about. In this article, you will learn about the main signs that will help you understand that a person is lying.

Why it can be difficult to recognize lies

Not all common signs of lying indicate that a person is lying. There are truthful, but very insecure people who are afraid to tell the truth, but nevertheless tell it. Due to psychological stress, such a person hesitates in conversation, stumbles, pulls with an answer, and sometimes gives the impression of a liar, but in fact he is not.

There are also people who are so used to behaving dishonestly that outwardly they behave quite naturally. Deception is a way of their life, in which they are quite comfortable and warm. They have no feeling of discomfort at all.

You can recognize a lie in three cases:

The interlocutor feels guilty at the moment when he lies;
He feels a sense of fear that the deception will be revealed;
He has no conscience or fear, but he was not ready to talk.

Pay attention to the last point - it is key! If it is important for you to get information from someone, and you suspect that the interlocutor will deceive you, do not let him prepare in advance for the conversation. Acting spontaneously is the best way to get the truth or recognize a lie.

The main signs of a lie

You can hardly understand for sure that a person is lying to you. The fact is that all the signs of lying, rather, indicate that the interlocutor is not in the mood for a frank conversation. He is lying, or is hiding part of the truth, but at the same time he is not deceiving, you can find out by analyzing the conversation in detail. A sociable liar pretends to be inconsistent in a conversation, but he needs to be nudged a little into such actions, actively supporting the dialogue. It is very difficult with a closed interlocutor, but you can pay attention to his gestures, gaze, and other non-verbal signs.

Non-verbal signs:

Crossed legs, arms, or closed fingers;
Uncomfortable position of the interlocutor - he cannot relax and get comfortable in any way. He constantly changes his posture, treads from foot to foot, does not know where to put his hands;
A minimum of gestures. A person is lying, which means he weighs every spoken word. He is not distracted by facial expressions and gestures, so as not to get lost and not give himself away;
He does not look the interlocutor in the eye, or does not keep his gaze on him. Lost if the interlocutor looks at him carefully;
Behaves either fussy or inhibited (depending on the type of temperament), but not as usual;
The liar is playing for time. Before answering a question, he looks at the ceiling, lights a cigarette, and begins to “search” for something in his bag. This sign may also indicate that it is psychologically difficult for your interlocutor to support the chosen topic, in other words, you touched him to the quick.

Verbal signs:

Scam tactics

All of the above is most relevant for everyday situations, when a man is lying to a woman, a child is lying to a mother, a wife is to her husband, etc. The meaning of lies was to hide the truth, but not to seek profit. Fraudsters are professional liars, but even they, at least in some way, give themselves away. The highlights are as follows:

Extraordinary politeness. You can openly show dislike to this person - he will not be offended. He doesn't care about your emotions at all - he achieves his goal;
"Your own in the board." If being polite isn't something to hook you, the scammer will try to please you in a different way. This is also how the gypsies act at the station and…. maniacs. A sobbing girl can be supported by talking about “what bastards are men,” and, for example, by telling her “your” story for persuasiveness. With a student, you can scold the education system, with a poor pensioner - the current government. Thus, the fraudster is rubbed into the confidence of the interlocutor and lulls his vigilance;
Agrees all the time. You can say anything - next to a swindler, you will feel like a great orator and someone who cannot connect two words. Has a suspicion crept in that they want to deceive you? Catch the interlocutor at the inconsistency. Rest assured, he really doesn't even listen to you - he doesn't really care what you say;
Forces you to repeat something all the time. The most alarming sign, because this is already a hypnotist's tactic. "You agree with me, huh?" several times in a row says that they are trying to manipulate you. Don't waste time trying to figure out if the person is lying to you, or if it's his communication style! Stop the dialogue under any pretext - this is a fraudster, and an experienced one.

Video: How to understand that a person is lying

A very useful video! In it, the psychologist tells all about the methods of deception and signs of lies in the behavior of the interlocutor.

Unfortunately, life is arranged in such a way that you can face a lie at any time. If in some conversation it is important for you to hear the truth, then a few useful recommendations of a psychologist on how to understand that a person is lying can be useful.

How to understand that a person is lying to you according to his manner of conducting a conversation

In a conversation, pay attention to the following features of the interlocutor's speech, which with a high probability may indicate that he is lying:
The speech of a deceiving person can be saturated with a huge number of facts that are not directly related to the topic of conversation, with the help of which the liar tries to convince you of his truthfulness;
It is very likely that a person is lying when, in a conversation, he answers a question with a question, thereby giving indirect answers.
Repetition of your question before answering may indicate that your interlocutor is simply buying time and coming up with the most "plausible" answer on the fly.
If a person jokes instead of answering, then this may be a sign of his insincerity and attempts to hide truthful information.
You can understand that a person is lying by the emotional coloring of his speech. Usually, when people try to cheat, their voice sounds higher and louder than usual, and their speech is faster.

How to understand that a person is deceiving you by the behavior of his hands and feet

A person who is trying to deceive someone with his hands can involuntarily touch his nose, cover his mouth, or fussily gesticulate.

Legs also betray a person's latent desire to get away from a truthful answer - he either shifts from foot to foot, or, in general, takes a step back.

How to understand that a person is lying in his eyes

The phrase "Eyes on me!", Uttered during the interrogation of the suspect, wanders from one film investigator to another. Indeed, the movement of a person's eyes can indicate whether he is lying or not.

The fact is that the eyeballs are located depending on which part of the human brain is currently involved. Or, in other words, by observing the position of the eyes, you can understand what the brain is doing in the process of thinking - processing real information or fantasizing. It's almost a science, but here are some relationships between eye position and the direction of the human brain:
If a person's eyes look up and to the right in relation to you, then this means that he is not trying to deceive you, but recalls real events;
If a person looks up and to the left, this means that he is trying to come up with some kind of visual image;
The direction of the gaze directly and to the right in relation to the interlocutor indicates that the person is trying to remember the sounds, and if he looks straight and to the left, he comes up with phrases that he did not hear;
If a person looks down and to the right in relation to you, it means that he carefully chooses words for conversation, down and to the left - he remembers smells, aromas, tactile sensations;

However, if you decide to understand that a person is lying in his eyes, then do not forget that in left-handers all the above relationships are mirror-opposite.

How to understand that a person is lying on his emotional state

For a person who is trying to deceive you, all emotions may appear with some delay, since he, thinking about his own, does not follow the current conversation well;
An attempt at deception may also be evidenced by too violent manifestation of emotions, with the help of which the liar tries his real feelings.

And the last thing. If you suspect that a person is lying to you, then look at him directly and express doubts about the sincerity of what was said or ironically react to his words. Also try to interrupt the dialogue with an unexpected question several times.

Such actions of yours will create unfavorable conditions for lying, will bring the liar out of the state of emotional balance, he will psychologically "fuss" and this will help you more confidently identify the fact of lies.

How often in a conversation with someone it is difficult for us to understand whether the interlocutor is truthful. No one is happy about the prospect of being deceived. Practical psychology gives advice on how to detect a liar. You just need to carefully monitor the behavior and speech of the speaker.

Excessive emphasis on one's honesty, when the interlocutor's speech is overflowing with all kinds of vows, gives rise to doubt his veracity.
A defiant and dismissive tone, intentional rudeness can also expose a liar.
Eyes, gestures, facial expressions can give out a lying person. A person who wants to hide something usually tries to be closed during a conversation. This is evidenced by crossed arms, looking away to the side and shifting eyes.
Emotions can also testify to a lie. It can be confusion from an unexpected question, an attempt to avoid the interlocutor's gaze, excessive activity, or, conversely, inaction.

How the eyes react to lies

In a conversation with a person, you should follow the direction of his gaze. A look that goes to the left, then descends to the bottom, speaks of a painful search for the right words. And the words that he says at the moment are devoid of sincerity.

A glance directed upwards to the right indicates that a person is working to create false information.

Therefore, if the reaction to a direct question was to look right up and then left down, there is no doubt that a false statement will follow. In this case, the person first worked on creating an image he had never seen before, and then proceeded to formulate it verbally.

There are professional liars, who in the custom of making "preparations" of lies in advance, they keep the required picture ready in their imagination. In this case, the liar's eyes will be directed upwards to the left.

If the interlocutor has already been noticed in a lie, then you just need to remember his tricks, features of his gaze, behavior, in order to protect yourself from lies.

How to spot lies during a conversation

How to understand if a person is telling the truth or deceiving? There are three types of deceivers.

People who strive to look smarter than everyone in different situations. They stick in all conversations, portray awareness in all topics. But if you ask such a know-it-all a leading concretizing question, he gets off with general phrases.
Profit seekers. These deceivers are generous with compliments. So they try to win over, lull suspicion and get their own. These people are dangerous enough. It is important here to be observant and not be a simpleton.
Natural born deceivers. They are carried away by deception so much that they themselves believe in it, so they speak sincerely. Such high skill can be very misleading. Only later, after analyzing the conversation, can deception be established.

Methods for determining lies

Ask a question to the interlocutor and pay attention to his answer. If he repeats the question before answering, or hesitates to answer, then he feverishly comes up with a plausible answer, so he is delaying with it. The answer in the form of an anecdote or a joke is also indicative. A joking opponent also reveals himself to be a deceiver.
Pay attention to the behavior of the interlocutor. If the answer is a cough that clears your throat, if the rate of speech sharply accelerates, then there is a nervousness of the person about to lie. The truthful storyteller can return to the middle of the story by remembering something and adding some details. If the story is invented, it is not kept in memory, and in this case the narrator will not dare to make a move back and think about something, as you can easily get lost.
Pay attention to your opponent's gestures. Gestures to a person are usually dictated by his subconscious. When a person wants to isolate himself from you, during a conversation he scratches the back of his head, touches his face. If he took a small step back during communication, this shows that he wants to leave, as he is led by the desire to hide something. A head down is also a sign of closeness.

What is the experience of a person who tells a lie? He experiences a state of stress without realizing it. And this stress is followed physiological reactions.

One of them is frequent blinking. However, a person often blinks in the case of just an unpleasant conversation for him.

The movement of the shoulder, arm or leg on one side of the body is a sure sign that a person is not thinking at all what he is saying. Also, a step back during a conversation is a signal that the person does not believe at all in what he is saying.

In the event that the liar suddenly realized that he had betrayed himself in some way, he begins to diligently watch himself. His speech becomes slow, balanced. He can joke, but body tension, a somewhat uncomfortable posture (crossed arms, legs) can give him away.

If a person shows sympathy, but gloats in his soul, he will be betrayed by the trembling corners of his lips. And if you notice the pursed lower lip of the interlocutor, you should not trust his promise.

Do not trust a smile if it is asymmetrical. According to some psychologists, facial asymmetry during conversation is a sure sign of a person's lies.

A raised chin of a person with an external smile speaks of his irritation and annoyance towards you.

The excitement or compulsion to tell a lie causes the person to touch his neck with his hands. Especially visible is the fear of speaking out, if he holds his throat with his hand, as if holding back the words rushing from his throat.

Folded hands in a lock is a sign of hiding something or the desire to restrain oneself from uttering something unnecessary. Hands hidden in a pocket or folded on the chest can also speak of a lie.

When the cheater wants to cheer himself up, he resorts to stroking himself with his fingers.

If your opponent's hand is cold when shaking hands, you should be wary of whether he is afraid of exposure. However, it may also be a lack of blood circulation.

The stress of telling lies leads men to scratch their nose, as there is an excitable zone in the nose.

To avoid becoming a victim of a deceiver, you can use several techniques.

Try to rise above the interlocutor (higher chair), which will subconsciously suppress him.

If possible, reduce the distance between him and himself, thus encroaching on his personal space.

To make it more difficult for a liar to cheat, try to establish trust by imitating him in gestures and posture.

Do not take the position of the accuser. It will be smarter to pretend that you did not understand something and ask to repeat it. Thus, the deceiver will have the opportunity to change his mind and give a truthful answer.